Wicked Thoughts

A broken swing

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THE NEWS

Odd news from around the world

Zambian teachers say they live in fear of ‘invisible sex’ with witches: “It seems that teachers at the Nashongo and Makaba primary schools in Siavonga, Zambia have threatened to abandon their posts after a rash of indecent incidents involving invisible witches. According to Chief Sinadambwe of the Tonga-speaking people, the saucy sorcerers have been projecting their spirits into the teachers’ bedrooms and molesting them. ‘The male teachers complained that they have been having sex with women they cannot see. This has been happening to them for about three weeks.’ Chief Sinadambwe says that similar incidents have been happening to the women, one of whom claims that she went to sleep and when she woke up found herself naked with her nightgown on the floor. Her husband “expressed ignorance” and the only conclusion that could possibly be drawn was that she was the victim of some esoteric tomfoolery. Guys, I have some advice for getting rid of those insatiable ladies of the night. Tell them you’re 31 and you still live with your mother. Trust me – you’ll never see them again.”

Girls must be encouraged to be ‘disruptive’ to prepare them to do battle in their careers, says schools boss: “Girls should be ‘disruptive’ in class as challenging authority will help them in their careers, according to the boss of a leading private school group. Dr Kevin Stannard, head of innovation and learning at the Girls’ Day School Trust, which runs 26 schools, said it was common for girls to be praised for good manners, politeness and even neat written work. But it would be more ‘empowering’ for young women to question what they are told and take risks, he said. However men earn around 10 per cent more than women, recent figures showed, and Dr Stannard warned that praising girls for their politeness, neatness and balanced well thought-out essays may be counterproductive. Dr Stannard said ‘Of course, encouragement of ‘misbehaviour’ should only go so far. We don’t want to motivate students to not value academic success. ‘But disruptiveness – as in the willingness to question, suggest alternatives, challenge, take risks, adapt and lead – can be very empowering.’”

How the scent of chocolate could help reverse decline in number of people buying books from a shop: “Booksellers could soon have a secret weapon in the war against declining trade – the smell of chocolate. Researchers in Belgium have discovered that shoppers are more likely to take their time browsing and buy books from certain genres if a bookstore smells of chocolate. Scientists from the Hasselt University in eastern Belgium conducted a 10 day experiment in a general interest book shop. The team dispersed a subtle smell of chocolate into the store that wasn’t immediately noticeable to customers but strong enough so that it could be identified once pointed out. The smell was present in the store for around half of the store’s opening hours and researchers found that customers were more likely to take their time in the store and talk to members of staff. The report, published in the Journal of Environmental Psychology, found specifically that ‘customers were 2.22 times more likely to closely examine multiple books when the chocolate scent was present in store, compared with the control condition.'”

Testicles have taste buds?: “Testicles have taste buds that can detect sweet flavours – and they’re essential for reproduction. Scientists say that, despite being a long way from the mouth, taste receptors on the testicles and anus can also detect the savory taste of umami – the amino acid in soy sauce. Researchers had no idea why the body parts had the receptors until they tried to breed mice without them for a study on taste. Their accidental discovery showed that male mice were rendered infertile when they were missing the proteins GNAT3 and TAS1R3 or were given a substance to block them from working. Having only one of the proteins means the male mice can still breed, but it turned out that when both of the proteins were missing, the sperm struggled to swim and the testes became malformed. ‘The males are sterile, their sperm count is low, and spermatozoa are not developed properly,’ said researcher Bedrich Mosinger told Business Insider.”

Giant image of Marilyn Monroe is grown in Japanese RICE field: “Marilyn Monroe standing above a subway grating with her crisp white dress blowing up is one of the most well-recognised movie scenes of the 20th Century. The famous moment in the 1955 film The Seven Year Itch is now regarded as an icon of film history. The Japanese are paying homage to the star in the form of a multicoloured rice field artwork. An image of Marilyn Monroe made from nine rice species with seven different colors has popped up on a rice filed in Inakadatemura, Aomori prefecture, northern Japan. This year two giant murals, depicting a traditional Japanese courtesan and iconic Hollywood actress Marilyn Monroe, are drawing large crowds to the field. The villagers used nine kinds of rice plants in seven colors to fashion the artworks on the field, which is 140 meters long and 100 meters wide.”

And don’t forget to catch up with all the Strange Justice before you go.

The Goose-step in London?

The Goose-step or parade march is usually used by the armies of extreme socialist States only — such as Hitler’s Das dritte Reich, the Union of the Soviet Socialist Republics and the People’s Democratic Republic of Korea

In this case it is dancers performing on the steps of St. Pauls Cathedral in London. The Central School of Ballet has specially commissioned the modern dance performance ‘Tilt’ as part of the City of London Festival

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THE NEWS

Odd news from around the world

Man lured by honey trap promise of rooftop sex with two women dies after falling over the edge during robbery: “A man tricked onto the top of a four-story building by women who said they would sleep with him was attacked by three men before falling to the ground. Robert Reichl, 50, from Bay Ridge in Brooklyn, climbed to the top of the building on Fourth Avenue near 47th St in Sunset Park after he was promised sex by two women, police said. Instead, he was set upon by a group of men who robbed him of $2,000 and sprayed him with mace, causing him to fall backwards off the roof. Police say Mr Reichl was seen drinking with young people on the sidewalk outside the building late that night, and later still went up onto the roof with two women, where he undressed. They believe the women went through his pockets and stole the cash before running downstairs. Then they believe three men went up to the roof and stole other items from Mr Reichl before one of them sprayed him in the face. Police have arrested three people in connection with the incident: Ruben Santiago, 23, Glennys Reyes, 23, and Randy Ortiz, 24.”

Woman was fired by her boss because he believed she was so attractive he would be tempted to start an affair: “THE Iowa Supreme Court has stood by its ruling a dentist acted legally when he fired an assistant because he found her too attractive. Mssa Nelson, 33, worked for James Knight for a decade. However despite being a stellar employee she was fired in 2010 after Mr Knight, who is married, felt she was too attractive and he was worried he would have an affair. Ms Nelson sued on the grounds of sex discrimination but the case was dismissed by the Iowa District Court, who ruled such firings do not count as illegal sex discrimination because they are motivated by feelings rather than gender. Ms Nelson appealed the case, but the Supreme Court upheld the view that an employee “may be lawfully terminated simply because the boss views the employee as an irresistible attraction,”

If you are ever in Des Moines, Iowa, dine at Fongs: “Mother-of-three Jackie Johnson-Smith was having a birthday dinner at a Des Moines, Iowa, pizza restaurant this week when she had to breastfeed her 12-month-old. Waitress Bodi Kinney saw her feeding, and Johnson-Smith saw that Kinney had seen her, and feared the worst. But she was in for a big surprise.
On the receipt, Kinney, wrote this note: “I bought one of your pizzas. Please thank your wife for breastfeeding!!” Johnson-Smith was so touched she shared the receipt on her Facebook page, and wrote: “The waitress gave this receipt to my husband. I was speechless and emotional. Although I don’t need a pat on the back for feeding my child, it sure felt amazing. It is amazing how we women can make each other feel when we empower each other.”

Another “innovative” Chinese building: “IT’S the newest landmark in China, and it has grabbed the limelight for its unusual design. The Sheraton Huzhou Hot Spring Resort, otherwise known as the ‘horseshoe hotel’ because of its strange ring shape, is preparing to open next month in Huzhou. Designed by architect Ma Yansong, the eye-catching 27-storey building is actually a full oval – two levels underground connect to form the visible doughnut-shape. It has a lavish interior, with 20,000 Swarovski and European natural crystal lamps creating a wavelike formation. The lobby floor is paved with Afghanistan White Jade and Tiger’s Eye Stone from Brazil. There are 321 rooms including 44 suites and 39 villas, with private balconies.”

King David’s palace ‘found’ in the city where he’s said to have battled Goliath: “Archaeologists have unearthed a palace in what they believe is the fortified Judean city of Shaarayim, where the Bible states King David battled the giant Goliath. The discovery of what is thought to be King David’s palace, measuring 1,000 square metres, was made by Hebrew University and the Israel Antiquities Authority. Over the past seven years the teams have also uncovered a huge storehouse containing pots and artefacts that they believe proves the existence of a ruler in Judah in the tenth century BCE. ‘The ruins are the best example to date of the uncovered fortress city of King David,’ professors Yossi Garfinkel and Saar Ganor of Hebrew University said. ‘This is indisputable proof of the existence of a central authority in Judah during the time of King David.’ Archeologists also found over 600 ceramic pots at the site. According to researchers the number of vessels uncovered indicates they were used for tax collection of agricultural produce”

And don’t forget to catch up with all the Strange Justice before you go.

Some exam bloopers from Britain

In one paper on General Franco, a student reliably informed his tutor, Nicholas Martin, a reader in European intellectual history at Birmingham University, that underwear was the secret weapon in the Spanish dictator’s armour, stating ‘General Franco was supported by right-wing panties’.

Meanwhile, a film studies student revealed that several of Hitchcock’s recurring themes arose because he was a ‘torched Catholic’. Martin McLoone, director of the Centre for Media Research at the University of Ulster, who submitted the entry, said: ‘Of course, in another era, he might well have been.’

Another student at a different institution mixed up his metaphors to describe Alain Resnais’ controversial Holocaust documentary Night And Fog as ‘a hotly contested potato’.

Jackie Eales, professor of early modern history at Canterbury Christ Church University, submitted an entry which stated: ‘Britain under the Cromwellian Protectorate was a piranha state’.

And Adam Hart, professor of science communication at the University of Gloucestershire, told how he was faced with an ‘unpleasant image’ of an unlikely union between two eminent Victorians when one student wrote: ‘Sex has puzzled biologists ever since it was discovered by Darwin and Mendel.’

There was also some confusion about the benefits of Nigella seeds and the effect of Ebola.

In one paper a student revealed that ‘Nigella seeds can cure all disease except death’ while another student suggested that ‘Ebola could lead to death, in some cases fatal’

Original story here

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THE NEWS

Odd news from around the world

Bird experts and scientists left puzzled as birds fall dead from Australian skies: “EXPERTS are looking for clues as to why common black kites are falling dead from north Queensland skies. Black kites, also known as shite-hawks and firebirds, are medium-sized birds of prey and are among the few raptor species which gather in flocks. Testing has so far excluded bird flu and Newcastle disease, both highly contagious viral infections linked to mass deaths of migratory wild birds, and transmissible to humans. But the cause of the latest spate of deaths, possibly linked to a cross-border infection, is still a mystery. Bird of prey expert James Biggs said it was highly unusual for raptors to die in large numbers or, literally, drop dead from the sky. “If it is not disease, it could possibly be poisoning, but without being familiar with the ongoing tests it is hard to know,” the Cairns Tropical Zoo bird supervisor said. Black kites prey on insects, small animals and birds, and can spend all day soaring on the wind”

The invisibility wetsuit that protects swimmers and surfers from deadly shark attacks: “Australian scientists have developed a pair of anti-shark wetsuits that make divers appear invisible by camouflaging their bodies in the sea and trick sharks into thinking surfers are poisonous. A team of researchers from the University of Western Australia joined forces with designers from Shark Attack Mitigation Systems (SAMS) to create the suits. The blue pattern of the Elude suit can’t be seen by the shark because the fish are colour blind. While the stripes on the Diverter suit mimic the colours of poisonous fish to warn the sharks off. The creators claim the suits could save lives. The Elude wetsuit is designed to be used by swimmers and divers and are covered in a jagged blue pattern, which works to conceal divers from sharks. The predators were recently found to be colour blind.”

Man 75, faces seven-year wait to see a doctor: “A 75-YEAR-OLD pensioner who was told he could wait up to seven years to see a specialist at Caboolture [public] Hospital has compared the public health system to that of a third-world country. Michael Symmons, a Caboolture resident, was referred by his GP to the hospital’s gastroenterology service for assessment several months ago. A standard ‘placement on waiting list’ letter indicated that Mr Symmons would be notified four weeks prior to an appointment. “When I telephoned to get an idea of the waiting time I was told six to seven years for the gastroenterology clinic,” he said. “This is just for a consultation. If a procedure is ­required I assume that is ­another long waiting list.” Metro North Health Service chief executive Malcolm Stamp confirmed some people were waiting beyond the recommended time. Mr Stamp said demand for the hospital’s small gastro-enterology service had outstripped capacity. Mr Stamp said Caboolture Hospital is currently reviewing its processes to better inform the community of waiting times.”

Hard to believe: “A pair of German inventors have created a digital pen that can check for spelling mistakes in handwriting. The Lernstift, which is German for learning pen, has a built-in sensor that recognises writing movements and tracks the shape of the letters to recognise words. It then vibrates when a mistake is made. Lernstift also has Wi-Fi built-in and the pen can be connected a smartphone or PC to upload written texts online, share them on social networks or take part in writing training. The computer inside the battery-powered Lernstift is an embedded Linux system. Current digital pens use optical sensors to pick up the writing movements and digitise the words or sketches so they can be used on a computer. Some of these pens require additional devices, while others only work with specialty paper. Lernstift is different because it has the technology and software built-in. The computer inside Lernstift is an embedded Linux system – a scaled-down version seen on some PCs and laptops.”

Engineers create cheap bendy batteries from WOOD that could be used to store energy generated by wind farms: “American engineers have created a tiny, flexible, environmentally-friendly battery made of wood. The University of Maryland has coated a sliver of wood in tin to make an efficient battery with components 1,000 times thinner than a piece of paper. The tiny battery uses sodium ions instead of lithium ions that are found in mobile phone batteries. Wood fibres are coated with carbon nanotubes and then packed into small disks of tin. The sodium ions moving around in the wood fibres creates an electric current. The battery is 1,000 times thinner than a piece of paper. It can also last for 400 charging cycles – eight times more than traditional sodium ion batteries. This type is low cost and common materials make it ideal to store huge amounts of energy at once, the scientists said.

And don’t forget to catch up with all the Strange Justice before you go.

One way to sleep

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THE NEWS

Odd news from around the world

British learner driver dials emergency number to complain about late instructor: “A learner driver has been given a lesson in 999 calls after phoning emergency services because his instructor was late. The pair rowed over the lesson’s start time and before things got out of hand the tutor scrapped it and asked the learner to get out of the car. But the furious learner warned that he would get the police involved – pleaded with a police operator after dialling 999. The call was made to West Midlands Police just after 8am last Thursday – and call handlers were shocked to learn that the male learner was demanding to “make a complaint”. In the recording the caller can be heard saying: “I’ve got an emergency; the tutor who’s supposed to be teaching me to drive came late and now she’s asking me to get out of her car. She’s saying I’m giving her attitude. Please come over. “I need someone to complain to. Who should I complain to?”

PayPal accidentally makes man a QUADRILLIONAIRE after transferring $92,233,720,368,547,800 into his account: “As a regular PayPal customer, Chris Reynolds spends no more than $100 a month. So when the 56-year-old checked his balance with the online money-transfer company recently, it was something of a surprise for him to be told he was a quadrillionaire – making him the world’s richest man. Mr Reynolds, from Delaware County, opened his monthly-statement by email on Friday to discover that his balance was a whopping $92,233,720,368,547,800. After overcoming his shock, he logged onto the PayPal site and saw that his balance was listed as zero

Terrified woman describes getting struck by lightning INSIDE a Louisiana supermarket: “On Monday afternoon, 33-year-old Lakeisha Brooks was in the check-out line of a Rouses grocery store in Houma, Louisiana, waiting to pay for some milk and cereal when the unthinkable happened: a bright flash, a loud crash – Brooks had been struck by lightning while standing inside a grocery store. ‘I felt like a breeze and then the pain came,’ she tells HoumaToday.com. The blast had blown Brooks’ shoe clean off her foot. Shocked, she hopped away to the other side of the store. When she looked back, she saw it strike the floor again in the exact same spot where she had just been struck. ‘A man there kept saying, “you never see lightning strike the same place twice.” Well, it did,’ she says. Brooks described the bizarre strike as feeling like hot oil running down her thigh, ‘like when you’re cooking, that pop,’ she says…. local authorities believe the lightning traveled through the store’s sprinkler system before it struck a metal plate on the floor, and ultimately striking Brooks.

Man who had it all throws it away on drugs: “HE lived a life of fantasy – a wealthy, French businessman whose decade-long liaison with a glamorous younger girlfriend was blotted with fiery break-ups and drug-fuelled sex. But David Monlun’s relationship with lover Sarah Manning came to a sudden end in May 2011, when he was found lying face down and lifeless in his penthouse at Darling Harbour. Yesterday an inquest into the 40-year-old’s death heard he had been partying with Ms Manning and her friend Jamie Philp through the night and into the early morning. CCTV footage later revealed them handling bottles and other items associated with the drug GHB, also known as “fantasy”. An autopsy revealed Mr Monlun had toxic doses of both GHB and the drug ice in his system, and police recovered a “substantial amount” of liquid fantasy from a safe in his bedroom.”

Museum’s ‘ancient relics’ exposed as a very modern swindle: “A Chinese museum has been forced to close after claims its 40,000-strong collection of supposedly ancient relics is almost entirely composed of fakes. The Jibaozhai Museum in Jizhou, a city in the northern province of Hebei, opened in 2010, its 12 exhibition halls packed with apparently unique cultural gems. But on Monday, the museum was shut after claims many of the exhibits were knock-offs bought for between 100 and 2000 yuan ($17.50 and $350). The museum’s public humiliation began earlier this month when visiting Chinese writer Ma Boyong noticed a series of inexplicable discrepancies and posted his findings online. Among the most striking errors were artefacts engraved with writing stating they dated back more than 4000 years to the time of China’s Yellow Emperor. But the Shanghai Daily said the writing was in simplified Chinese characters that only came into widespread use in the 20th century. The collection also had a ”Tang Dynasty” five-colour porcelain vase, despite the fact this technique was invented hundreds of years later during the Ming Dynasty.”

And don’t forget to catch up with all the Strange Justice before you go.

Typical cat

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THE NEWS

Odd news from around the world

Celebrity pizza apparitions: “PIZZA maker Domenico Crolla serves up not just dinner but celebrities on his award-winning pizzas. From Queen Elizabeth II to Anna Wintour this award-winning pizza maker, based in Glasgow, Scotland, has taken to putting the world’s most famous faces onto his Italian-themed slices of heaven. His celebrity-themed pizzas have started grabbing attention for more than just their flavour. Crolla can put anything on a pizza, from the face of Marlon Brando in The Godfather to Mitt Romney during the 2012 US election. With their soft doughy base, a covering of traditional tomato pizza sauce and mozzarella cheese Crolla serves up these incredible edible artworks to his customers on a per-request basis. Each pizza takes around an hour to create and when asked about his technique Crolla, like all good magicians, declined to spill his secret.

Man who couldn’t afford to buy the £40 bike he loved is given it 40 years later: “When motorcycle fanatic Brian Hill spotted the bike of his dreams on sale for around £40 he was heartbroken. It was 1968 and as a penniless, 21-year-old student he couldn’t scrape the funds together to buy the Vincent HRD classic. Instead he advised his friend John Lumley to snap it up, insisting it was a fantastic find that would one day pay off. For more than 40 years the pair still kept in touch from time to time and Mr Hill, from Longfield, Kent, always joked that he was now able to pay John £40 for the bike. In 2009, he received a sad phone call to say John had passed away from pancreatic cancer – but in an unexpected final gesture of kindness, he had left Mr Hill the 1937 Vincent Rapide in his will. The value of classic motorbikes has rocketed in the intervening years, and the rare motorcycle would now be expected to fetch around £225,000 if put up for auction.”

Weird products of a dyslexic mind: “A dyslexic designer has redesigned a range of household objects to reflect and explain how his mind works. Henry Franks’ ‘dyslexic objects’ range contains upside down inverted mugs, double-hooked coat hangers, an elevated coaster, and a pen pot that holds just two pens at a time. Mr Franks, who has recently been crowned Designer of the Year for his topsy-turvy creations, says that he created the range to put a dyslexic perspective on everyday household items. The 23-year-old, who is graduating from Northumbria University with a First-Class degree in 3D design, said: ‘I looked at the traits of dyslexia and applied them to objects. ‘I’ve had problems with reading because of the letters inverting so I applied it to a redesign of mugs. ‘The Muglexia products are more stable and balanced in the hand because the handle position is upside down and lower than normal. ‘The inverted shape also keeps tea and coffee hotter for longer”

Mother not happy. Family expecting FIFTH son: “A couple who discovered they are having a fifth son put a humorous spin on their pregnancy announcement, making it look as though the mother was miserable to be adding yet another boy to her brood. The triumphant father-of-four took to Reddit to share the hilarious photo, which shows him and his four boys striking happy superhero poses while his wife pretends to cry. Other Reddit users have commented on the photo to share their own experiences with male to female ratios in their families. One wrote: ‘My aunt wanted two girls and two boys. They had two girls, then they had three girls. . . then four, five, six, seven, eight. Then they said f*** it. They have eight beautiful girls though.’ Another said: ‘My parents had five boys and then stopped after they had me, the only girl. What can I say? They kept going until they got it right.’

Bride’s wedding gown goes up in flames — for photo shoot: “Trash The Dress photo shoots, where brides purposely ruin their wedding gowns in the name of art, is a decade-long trend that can involve anything from colorful paint bombs, to buckets of mud and in some case, balls of fire. Now, one woman has filmed her shoot, capturing the ‘crazy’ moment her pristine white dress is lit on fire before she bolts towards the ocean in a hurried attempt to put the flames out. Natasha Samuel, who married Daniel Yakcobi in May, was standing on a beach in Israel earlier this month when she had a friend douse her wedding gown in flammable liquid, before lighting a match. A photographer from Tel Aviv’s White Studio Photography captured the split second that Mrs Yakcobi stopped to smile, before she dashed towards the water. A fire extinguisher was also on hand to put out any extra flames, on both the bride and on the beach.”

And don’t forget to catch up with all the Strange Justice before you go.

Modern times

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THE NEWS

Odd news from around the world

Want a job as a ‘passenger assistant who is a good face-to-face communicator’?: “A bus company has been accused if losing its way with words after advertising for a ‘customer-facing passenger assistant.’ The Go-Ahead London advert for a bus conductor described the role as ‘brand new’ and said applicants need to be a ‘good face-to-face communicator’ who has a ‘natural flair for going “the extra mile”‘ and was fit enough to cope with standing for lengthy periods of time. Candidates were told that passenger assistants would work on a ‘unique’ new London double-decker bus which was ‘accessible’ and ‘convenient’ and asked if they had ‘the kind of personality that made last year’s Olympic gamesmakers so successful’. Officials suggested that a notice along the lines of ‘bus conductor wanted’ would have been more appropriate.”

Japanese look to change their fate by palm plastic surgery: “JAPANESE intent on changing their fate have begun having plastic surgeries to alter their palms. The new trend relies on the ancient art of palm reading – also known as palmistry -, the belief that you can tell a person’s future based on the lines on their palms. Plastic surgeons have reported an increase in patients asking for operations to extend or add lines associated with luck or marriage. According to a report on the Daily Beast, the surgeries cost around $1100 and are performed with an electric scalpel. Around 40 palm plastic surgeries have been performed at the Shonan Beauty Clinic alone in the last two years. The surgery is popular with men and women usually takes 10 to 15 minutes, includes anywhere between 5 and 10 lines on the palm, and takes about a month to heal.

‘Organic’ bottled water scam: “THAT triumph of marketing – the bottled water industry – has finally gone too far, with seven makers forced to drop claims that their product was “organic” while another chose to remove their brand from sale. The manufacturers got rid of their spin under threat of enforcement action from the Australian Competition and Consumer Commission, which is cracking down on misleading “credence” claims. The ACCC’s worry is that such claims can be wrongly used to justify higher prices and create a competitive advantage. “Organic standards acknowledge that water cannot be organic,” said ACCC deputy chairwoman Delia Rickard. “Any claim that particular water is organic would therefore be misleading or deceptive.” The word “organic”, in the context of food and drink, refers to agricultural products which have been farmed according to certain practices. Because water is not an agricultural product it can’t benefit from such practices so it can’t be described as “organic”, the ACCC said.”

Easter Bunny attacked by hot, cross customer: “A teacher with stress-related problems ripped the head off an Easter Bunny mascot at Bunnings in Albury in March and told a gathering of parents and children he was not real, a court heard Monday. Children began crying after Darren John Harry said: “It’s not the real Easter Bunny. He’s a fraud. Bunnings is a fraud taking down local hardware stores just like Mitre 10.” The person wearing a three-piece costume, including a helmet assembly with chin strap and large pink ears, had his head and neck jerked backwards when the bunny’s head was pulled by Mr Harry and the chin strap broke, The Border Mail reports. Another employee asked several times for Mr Harry to leave the store before being pushed in the chest with force. He lost his balance, fell backwards into a child and then to the ground with everything captured on closed-circuit camera. Mr Harry, 46, of Clem Drive, Lavington, appeared in Albury Local Court on charges of offensive behaviour, malicious damage and two counts of assault.”

Doctors appeal for help with mystery of American Navy vet who woke up without any memories of his life convinced he’s Swedish (which is all he can speak): “Michael Boatwright was discovered unconscious in a Motel 6 room in February, but when he awoke could not remember anything about himself, recognize even his own reflection, nor how to speak English. Even though his driver’s license says he was born in Florida and served in the U.S. Navy from 1971 to 1973, Boatwright has no memory of his life to date and now answers only to Johan and converses in Swedish to doctors with the help of an interpreter. Now, medical professionals in Palm Springs, California have appealed for help in solving the mystery of Boatwright, the only clues to his former life being a duffel bag, five tennis rackets, two cellphones, little cash, old photographs and his identification. Doctors at Desert Regional Medical Center have theorized that his total memory loss was triggered by some kind of emotional or physical trauma”

And don’t forget to catch up with all the Strange Justice before you go.

Breaking the ice with a lady

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THE NEWS

Odd news from around the world

Israeli man’s penis bitten by a snake as he went to the toilet: “A man was rushed to a hospital after a snake bit his penis while he was relieving himself in a toilet, according to hospital officials in Israel. The man, 35, of northern Israel was bitten on Friday after the snake suddenly appeared from inside the toilet. The man suffered minor injuries from the bite; fortunately the snake was not venomous. Rescue workers responded to the scene and took the man to Rambam Medical Center in Haifa, where he received medical treatment. The man told emergency workers it happened after he went to the toilet to relieve himself and suddenly felt a strong burning sensation in his penis. One of the paramedics said the man told him he has seen the snake and it was very small. According to the paramedic, despite the location of the injury, the man managed to stay calm and even had a laugh with workers at his own expense.”

Hundreds of tourists squeeze into Chinese water park in searing 100F heat: “With temperatures hitting 100F (37.7C), heading to the lake seemed like a sensible plan to keep cool. But imagine the dismay for these visitors when they arrived at this water park in eastern China to find that everyone else had had the same idea. There was barely elbow room to be had at the Playa Maya park in Wuhan, Hubei province yesterday as rubber rings and bodies fought for space in the water. In the middle of the melee, lifeguards clad in orange stood on high chairs keeping a watchful eye over the swimmers. Up to 10,000 people a day visit the 160,000 sq m park to play on its 40 rides, which include a wave machine and water coaster. The park disinfects its 21,000 cubic metres of water every four to six hours, according to eChinaCities.com, to deal with any hygiene worries caused by thousands of people sharing the same water.”

Too lazy to boil an egg? Just add water to this pre-cooked egg: “A British firm has decided boiling an egg is not as simple as – well, boiling an egg – and has come up with an egg-in-a-pot to help those with neither the time or skills to do it themselves. British firm Pork Farms’ Dippy Egg consists of a pre-cooked, pasteurised whole egg in its shell in a pot. You then simply add boiling water and wait five minutes and the result is – they promise – a perfectly-cooked soft-boiled egg every time. Business development director Mark Hodson told The Grocer magazine, who had a preview of the product, that with the lid doubling up as an egg cup, it can be eaten easily and with minimal mess in offices. While taking the margin for error out of the process, the Dippy Egg does take longer than traditional methods.

Joke names do not amuse airline: “ASIANA Airlines may sue an American TV station which aired fake and racially offensive names for four pilots on Flight 214 which crashed, killing three people, in San Francisco. Asiana says its reputation was damaged by a report on San Francisco TV station KTVU-TV. The trouble began Friday when an anchorwoman read out four joke names for the Flight 214 pilots. Tori Campbell read the names from a teleprompter. A graphic displayed the hoax names: “Captain Sum Ting Wong, Wi Tu Lo, Ho Lee Fuk and Bang Dong Ow.” The TV station said it checked the names with the National Transportation Safety Board and it confirmed them.

Neighbourhood pig: “One of Redfern’s most recognisable residents is a regular at inner-city shops and cafes, though his owners warn such pets ‘are not for everybody’. James, a 100 kilogram miniature pig, has become the suburb’s most famous resident since moving into Patrick Furlong’s small terrace house a year ago. Domestic pig ownership is on the rise in NSW and breeders and owners claim they make better pets than dogs. “Pigs have been getting a lot of good PR lately,” she said. “A lot of parents are wanting to buy their children a pig instead of a dog because they don’t trust dogs with their biting or with allergies. Pigs are not aggressive whatsoever. They’re very, very loving and just a very easy pet to have.” Pigs are considered intelligent, clean and placid pets that peacefully co-exist with humans and other animals. Mr Furlong said James was better-behaved than a dog and more lovable than a human but he required a lot of food and daily walks in Redfern Park.”

And don’t forget to catch up with all the Strange Justice before you go.

Britain’s Barbie steps out on a hot summer’s day

It’s Helen Flanagan

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THE NEWS

Odd news from around the world

China announces plans for the longest undersea tunnel in world: “It already boasts the world’s largest free-standing building, and of course the world’s most famous wall, but now it seems China is planning the world’s longest undersea tunnel. The tunnel will link Dalian and Yantai and will reportedly cost 260 billion yuan, almost £28billion. Architects from the Chinese Academy of Engineering are expected to submit finalised blue prints of the tunnel to the State Council next month, it has been reported. This will take the ambitious project, which will be about 123 kilometres long and link Dalian in Liaoning province to Yantai in Shandong province under the Bohai Sea, a step closer to implementation, the South China Morning Post said. If it is approved it is believed the resulting structure will be longer than the Seikan Tunnel and the Channel Tunnel combined- which are the world’s two longest tunnels.”

Man killed by a 1.5tonne cow after it crashes through his roof as he slept: “A Brazilian man died after a cow crashed through the roof of his home and landed on top of him as he lay sleeping in his bed. Joao Maria de Souza, 45, had been in bed with his wife Leni when the animal suddenly fell through the ceiling of their home in Caratinga, south east Brazil. The cow is believed to have escaped from a nearby farm and climbed onto the roof of the couple’s house, which backs onto a steep hill. The corrugated roof immediately gave way and the one-and-a-half-tonne horned bovine fell 8ft onto Mr de Souza’s side of the bed. His wife, and the cow, both reportedly escaped unharmed.” [It looks like an asbestos cement roof. A corrugated iron roof would not have given way]

Music style affects walkers’ pace: “MOST people synchronise their steps to a song’s beat when wired for sound but the tempo of the tune isn’t the only factor influencing pace. Even when different music has identical tempo and beat, other acoustic features influence walkers’ stride and speed, researchers at Belgium’s Ghent University have found. Walkers in a study heard samples of 52 different types of music all with the same tempo and a four-beat meter. However, their stride lengthened in response to some tunes and was shorter in response to others, and the variations caused an overall difference in the pace of their walk. Music that increased walking speed the most was frequently rated bad, aggressive, loud or fast, whereas emotions, familiarity or taste had little correlation to the music’s effect on pace. Pop-techno sounds tended to increase pace, compared to jazz-reggae, which decreased walking pace.”

Plaque marks Sandy message in a bottle: “A SEASIDE Long Island village has honoured the memory of a girl whose message in a bottle was found after Superstorm Sandy, discovered by cleanup workers a dozen years after she tossed it into the ocean. A plaque was placed on a rock near the bridge at Patchogue Long Island Beach Club, where the bottle was discovered in December. It reads: “Be excellent to yourself dude,” the same message inside the bottle. The note, a line from the 1989 Keanu Reeves movie Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure, was written by Sidonie Fery and tossed into the ocean inside a ginger ale bottle. She died in 2010 at the age of 18 in a fall from a cliff in Switzerland. But because the note included the girl’s New York City phone number, what otherwise would have been a worthless piece of rubbish became a priceless memento. Workers in Patchogue, about 100 kilometres east of Manhattan, called the number and returned the bottle to her mother, Mimi Fery. Fery said she sobbed when she heard workers had found the bottle and was grateful to them. “It’s unbelievable,” she said on Saturday of the commemoration.

Mothers charged $5 for screaming during childbirth: “Poor women have been exploited at their most vulnerable time by a hospital that charged them $5 every time they screamed during child birth. The shocking discovery was made by a U.S. group that campaigns against corruption, as it released its annual Global Corruption Barometer. At the hospital in Zimbabwe, one of the poorest countries in the world, the fine was said to be for ‘raising a false alarm’, according to Transparency International. Women who were unable to pay the fine were allegedly kept in the hospital until their families could pay. Interest was also added to the fines, according to the Washington Post. Many mothers already avoid hospital deliveries in the African nation because of the $50 cost, which is about the third of the average $150 income.”

And don’t forget to catch up with all the Strange Justice before you go.

Poll reveals most misheard song lyrics

IF you’ve sung of holding Tony Danza closer, dreams constructed of cheese or chasing penguins – you’re not alone. Streaming service Spotify has clarified the most misheard lyrics in Australia, or if you’re feeling fancy, our Top 10 mondegreens.

And thankfully we’ve moved on from thinking the Go-Go’s were singing Alex the Seal instead of Our Lips Are Sealed to messing up lyrics in Flume and Adele songs.

The clear winner is Elton John’s classic Tiny Dancer, with 19 per cent of those surveyed mistaking the song’s title for `80s TV star Tony Danza.

ABBA wrote their iconic Dancing Queen to contain the lyric “see that girl, watch that scene, digging the dancing queen”. However for many Australians the lyric is “see that girl, watch her scream, kicking the dancing queen.”

Maybe it was the recent meme that went viral, but 12 per cent of those quizzed think Annie Lennox is a nocturnal dairy lover singing “Sweet dreams are made of cheese” not “sweet dreams are made of this” in the Eurythmics’ Sweet Dreams.

Randomly, 11 per cent of Australians mistake the line “concrete jungle where dreams are made of” in Jay-Z’s Empire of State of Mind for “concrete jungle wet dream tomato.”

Avril Lavigne sang “You promised me I’m never gonna find you fake it” in her first hit Complicated. Some clearly hungry Australians think she’s actually singing “you promised me I’m never gonna find your bacon” instead.

Maybe there’s an ulterior motive for the eight per cent of those surveyed who hear Jon Bon Jovi singing “It doesn’t make a difference if we’re naked or not” rather than “if we make it or not” in his band’s hit Livin’ on a Prayer.

The poll includes a classic misheard lyric – “Excuse me while I kiss this guy” rather than “excuse me while I kiss the sky” in Jimi Hendrix’s Purple Haze.

And it’s a simple word but it makes so much difference – some people think Aqua are singing “come on Barbie, let’s go potty” instead of “party” in Barbie Girl.

Maybe Sydney dance whiz Flume will be flattered that six per cent of those surveyed have mistaken the lyric in his hit Holdin’ On to be “I’m a hip shaking llama” rather than “my hip shaking mama.”

The animal theme continues for the small number of people who think Adele is singing “Chasing penguins” instead of “chasing pavements” in her ballad of the same name.

Other bizarre mondegreens thrown up by the poll are those who think the Kooks are singing “she’s not fond of Russians” rather than “she’s not fond of asking” in Naïve, and some food lovers who think the Calvin Harris song is called “Sexy gherkin” not Sweet Nothing.

And Queen’s Bohemian Rhapsody may be a rock classic but there’s some creative Australians hearing Freddie Mercury sing “spare him his life or his pork sausages” rather than the actual line, “spare him his life from this monstrosity”.

Original story here

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THE NEWS

Odd news from around the world

More brilliant British bureaucracy: “Senior doctors have expressed outrage at an NHS Trust’s plans to move a unit which treats vulnerable children to just metres away from a paedophile therapy centre. The Tavistock Children’s Day Unit, currently located in Gloucester House in Hampstead, north London, treats children up to the age of 16 with mental health problems including specialist services for those who have suffered trauma or have special educational needs. But Tavistock and Portman NHS Trust is giving serious consideration to building a new unit for the children in the gardens of the nearby Portman Clinic, the Camden New Journal reports. It is one of the only places in the country where paedophiles can receive treatment on the NHS. Patients, who refer themselves voluntarily, are given ‘forensic psychotherapy’ in a bid to restrict their urges. One therapist, who asked not to be named, told the Camden New Journal: ‘This is very disturbing indeed – it is tantamount to trying to treat alcoholics in a brewery.'”

Why 1978 was the year the world never had it so good: We had the perfect balance of wealth, work and happiness: “Modern life and its trappings – financial crisis, war, the threat of terrorism and global warming – leaves many hankering after the good old days. And, according to new research, with good reason. Scientists have discovered that despite an overabundance of polyester flares and bouffant hair, 1978 was the year that the world’s quality of life peaked, after which it has gradually deteriorated. Australian experts used a novel method to track the social and economic progress of the world, taking into account various economic, lifestyle-related and ecological factors to come to their conclusion. Experts at the University of Canberra found that while global GDP – a measure of a economic progress – has increased over time, a more complex measure taking quality of life into account, called GPI, in fact peaked in 1978 and never recovered. GPI starts by using the same figures as GDP, but uses 24 other factors including crime rates, pollution levels, loss of wetland, car accident rates and even the amount of people who volunteer and enjoy housework to give a country its rating.”

Meet the small yellow worm that can REGROW its own head – and its old memories: “Scientists have discovered that not only can the planarian worm regrow its head if its cut off, the regenerated brain contains the same memories that were stored in the decapitated one. Researchers from Tufts University in Boston tested the memory of the planarian worms by measuring how long it took them to reach food in a lab environment. The small yellow worms had been trained to ignore the bright lights in the lab so they could find their meals without being distracted and the scientists found that even after decapitation worms remembered this training. Planarian worms live all over the world in fresh and saltwater ponds. A planarian worm that is cut in half, for example, is capable of regrowing brains and nervous systems to create two, separate worms.

Pigs that swim: “NOBODY is quite sure how they got there. But a picturesque island in the Bahamas has been taken over by a group of pigs. And they’re BIG fans of the water. Welcome to Big Major Cay Island on the Bahamian archipelago of Exuma, otherwise known as ‘Pig Beach’. Legend has it that sailors left pigs on this tiny, uninhabited island planning to return and use them for food, but they never came back and now the pigs rule the seas. Other theories include that they were part of a business scheme to attract tourists to the Bahamas. Either way, the approximately 20 pigs are thriving and are frequently fed by locals and tourists. The pigs frolic in the water and have impressive paddling skills that see them swim far out to passing boats in the hope of a snack. And some locals take the plunge too, because swimming with dolphins is overrated, right?

Woman who auctioned off virginity online says she was ‘tricked’: “A WOMAN who auctioned off her virginity online for $US780,000 says she was tricked and that she is still a virgin. Catarina Migliorini, 21, told the Huffington Post that she was duped by documentary maker Justin Sisely in an effort to get publicity for his film Virgins Wanted. “I felt I was a victim … I was misled by Mr Justin Sisely,” Ms Migliorini said. “I believe he is trying to defraud me and others.” After an online auction, a 53-year-old Japanese man who called himself “Natsu” online outbid other rivals for Ms Migliorini’s virginity. But she says when she went to meet him in a Sydney restaurant he didn’t match the description that Sisely gave her and that they didn’t have sex. Ms Migliorini said she was meant to receive 20 per cent of the profits of the documentary as well as all of the auction money but saw none of it. She says she believes that Natsu never existed and that she was played for a fool.”

And don’t forget to catch up with all the Strange Justice before you go.

THE JEWISH QUARTERBACK

The coach had put together the perfect team for the Chicago Bears.

The only thing that was missing was a good quarterback. He had scouted all the colleges and even the Canadian and European Leagues, but he couldn’t find a ringer who could ensure a Super Bowl win.

Then one night while watching CNN he saw a war-zone scene in the West Bank. In one corner of the background, he spotted a young Israeli soldier with a truly incredible arm. He threw a hand-grenade straight into a 15th story window 100 yards away.

KABOOM!

He threw another hand-grenade 75 yards away, right into a chimney.

KA-BLOOEY!

Then he threw another at a passing car going 90 mph.

BULLS-EYE!

“I’ve got to get this guy!” Coach said to himself. “He has the perfect arm!”

So, he brings him to the States and teaches him the great game of football. And the Bears go on to win the Super Bowl.

The young man is hailed as the great hero of football, and when the coach asks him what he wants, all the young man wants is to call his mother.

“Mom,” he says into the phone, “I just won the Super Bowl!”

“I don’t want to talk to you, the old woman says.”You are not my son!”

“I don’t think you understand, Mother,” the young man pleads. “I’ve won the greatest sporting event in the world. I’m here among thousands of my adoring fans.”

“No! Let me tell you!” his mother retorts. “At this very moment, there are gunshots all around us. The neighborhood is a pile of rubble. Your two brothers were beaten within an inch of their lives last week, and I have to keep your sister in the house so she doesn’t get raped!” The old lady pauses, and then tearfully says,……….

“I will never forgive you for making us move to Chicago !!!!

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THE NEWS

Odd news from around the world

Stupid woman tries to kiss a lion: “A Canadian teen got a little too close for comfort to a lion she was helping care for in a South African rehabilitation facility when the beast tried to drag her into its cage by the legs. Lauren Fagen, 18, was volunteering at the Moholoholo Wildlife Rehabilitation Centre when she leaned in to kiss the beast’s fur. The Montreal girl was then pulled into the animal’s cage, her legs gnawed and gashed by the lion and its mate, before she was finally dragged away by a lifesaving fellow volunteer. Fagen’s job was to clean cages. Only trained professionals are allowed to feed the lions. But Fagen wasn’t feeding 5-year-old Duma, a male, when the attack occurred. She was leaning in to kiss its fur, reports the Canadian Globe and Mail. The lion grabbed her and dragged her legs into the cage, where it began tearing at them. Its mate joined in, as well, by pouncing on the girl’s feet. ‘I should have died or lost a leg. It was a miracle that I survived,’ she said.”

MI: Vehicle with mounted “gun” panics Detroit suburb: “A man driving an armor-plated military-type vehicle and firing what appeared to be a machine gun mounted on top caused a ripple of panic in suburban Detroit on the Fourth of July. It turned out the weapon was a modified World War II .50-caliber machine gun that had been converted to fire compressed gas. It produced bright flashes and loud gunfire sounds as the driver, a man in his 40s, drove around Shelby Township.”

How ridiculous!: “The lengths people are willing to go to own a pair of plumped cheeks and a line-free complexion are well-documented, but a new Japanese gadget could trump even the wackiest gizmo out there. Named the Face Slimmer, it claims that to ‘maintain the perfect visage, you don’t need to go under the surgeon’s knife’. It goes on to explain that the device, costing £40 ($61), is a simple solution to the ‘timeless problem of how to give sagging facial skin and muscles that need a much-needed daily lift’. Users are advised to insert the mouthpiece and make mouth movements with it for three minutes a day. And they suggest that you can do the exercises anywhere – ‘when looking in the mirror or when you’re in the bath’. By carrying out the daily face workout, the manufacturers claim that a person strengthens what they describe as the ’12 expression muscles’.”

Back to the typewriter! “The Russian secret services are deploying an innovative new weapon in the age of cyber-spying – the almost forgotten typewriter. Kremlin counter-intelligence officers reckon this is the only way to prevent their most classified information being stolen by the kind of computer-based data theft exposed by renegade U.S. agent Edward Snowden. An order for 20 typewriters has been made by the elite Federal Guard Service, known by the acronym FSO, which is in charge of protecting Russian president Vladimir Putin, his prime minister Dmitry Medvedev, and other senior officials, it was disclosed on Thursday. Snowden’s presence with his laptops – said to be bulging with U.S. secrets – in the transit lounge at Moscow’s Sheremetyevo, brings the threat of cyber-spying home to Russia, explained pro-Kremlin newspaper Izvestia. Unlike printers, every typewriter has its own individual pattern of type so it is possible to link every document to a machine used to type it”

British pubs desperate to stop customers stealing glasses fit them with INK-EXPLODING security tags: “Next time you or a friend are tempted to take a glass home with you after a night in the pub you might be left red-faced – literally. Cider-maker Kopparberg is so fed up with people stealing its branded glasses it has created a security tag that covers would-be thieves with red or blue ink. The ink-exploding devices are fitted around the middle of a glass and are triggered when the glass is taken more than 100 feet from the bar. Kopparberg is trialling the device in response to record numbers of thefts of its new branded glassware. Custom-made and branded glasses have become collector’s items and many are sold on sites such as eBay.”

And don’t forget to catch up with all the Strange Justice before you go.