Great Philosophers Of The 20th Century

January 26, 2016 at 2:53 pm | Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

~ John Glenn… As I hurtled through space, one thought kept crossing my mind – every part of this rocket was supplied by the lowest bidder.

~ Desmond Tutu… When the white missionaries came to Africa they had the Bible and we had the land. They said ‘Let us pray.’ We closed our eyes. When we opened them we had the Bible and they had the land.

~ David Letterman… America is the only country where a significant proportion of the population believes that professional wrestling is real but the moon landing was faked.

~ Howard Hughes… I’m not a paranoid, deranged millionaire. I’m a billionaire.

~ Old Italian proverb… After the game, the King and the pawn go into the same box.

~ Betsy Salkind… Men are like linoleum floors. Lay ’em right and you can walk all over them for thirty years.

~ Jean Kerr… The only reason they say ‘Women and children first’ is to test the strength of the lifeboats.

~ Zsa Zsa Gabor… I’ve been married to a communist and a fascist, and neither would take out the garbage.

~ Jeff Foxworthy… You know you’re a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn’t.

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THE NEWS

Odd news from around the world

British cops BREAK INTO ‘unsecure’ homes: “Police have been accused of ‘breaking and entering’ and ‘trespassing’ after letting themselves into people’s unlocked homes and tweeting pictures as part of a bizarre anti-burglary drive. The Coventry City Police team has faced an angry backlash on social media after publicising how officers have been testing front doors while carrying out burglary patrols of the city. The photos, one of which has been retweeted by West Midlands Police’s chief constable, showed police inside hallways to make a point that the homeowner’s property was ‘unsecure’. But the approach has sparked outrage online, with one Twitter user, Craig Walder, posting: ‘If you enter my home like this, don’t be surprised if I use reasonable force when I hear you.'”

Man reveals how a Big Issue seller thanked him for giving him change and hot drinks by treating HIM to a coffee after winning £20 on a scratchcard: “A touching post about a Big Issue seller’s generosity after winning £20 on a scratchcard has been warming the hearts of thousands on social media. Joe Wilson shared a photo of Glasgow magazine seller, Daniel Collins, who had bought him a coffee with the winnings to say thank you for the hot drinks, money and chats he had given him in the past. He wrote in the post, uploaded to Facebook on Saturday: ‘This is Daniel. He sells the Big Issue outside Hillhead library. Each week, I stop and have a chat, give him a couple of quid, if I have it, and buy him a coffee from the place I go to for a breakfast. ‘Today, I did the same as usual but when I went to pay for my breakfast, the girl in the cafe told me it had already been paid for…by Daniel. ‘He’d won £20 on a scratchcard and decided he was going to treat me for a change. ”

Australian bikini designer who achieved overnight success with her cheeky designs: “An Australian bikini designer has struck a goldmine with her cheeky designs and clever marketing tactics and now runs a business that turns over millions of dollars in sales. 26-year-old Karina Irby says she has one goal in mind with her designs – for customers to realise the Port Macquarie designer’s mantra: ‘it’s not just a bikini, it’s a lifestyle.’ To advertise her designs, she uses models dusted with sand while posing on beautiful beaches. Self-taught, the young designer spent hours ‘YouTubing’ to learn how to make and design swimwear. In an interview with the Daily Mail Australia she said: ‘When I launched we had about 100 pieces in 12 different styles online, they sold out within a week. Buyers from Australia, America, Europe, Russia and as far away as Iceland are snapping up the swimwear Ms Irby’s showcases on her Instagram account”

Monkey adopts pup: “A monkey in southern India seems to have a serious case of ‘puppy love’ and has ‘adopted’ a homeless puppy. The rhesus macaque has taken the abandoned dog under its wing – and now the pair are inseparable. They are so close in fact, and their bond so unbreakable, that they go everywhere together and are the talk of Erode, Tamil Nadu in southern India. A series of touching photographs, viewed 170,000 times on Facebook, shows the rhesus macaque feeding, cleaning and protecting the tiny puppy as though it were its own baby. Another shot shows the monkey picking dirt and fleas off the little dog, in a cleaning session in the middle of the street. Bizarrely, he even clutches the puppy to its chest as it leaps from a tree – as the dog holds on. The monkey also shows its aggressive side, bearing its teeth to frighten off stray dog.”

Purr-fect storm of confusion as electoral commission mistakenly sends an enrol-to-vote letter to a cat – named Chairman Meow: “A woman was shocked to received a letter addressed to her pet cat reminding him to enrol to vote in time for the next election. Tiana Lyes posted a photo of the head-scratching letter, sent from the Electoral Commission to her cat Chairman Meow, onto Twitter on Saturday and within days it drew hundreds of comments and laughs. She believes that her cat received the letter because their vet sends mail directly to Chairman Meow and Ms Lyes has recently changed addresses. But in a sad twist, she revealed Chairman Meow won’t be able to enrol not only because he’s a feline, but because he is missing. Ms Lyes said she is hoping that his internet fame because of the letter mishap will help bring Chairman Meow home.

And don’t forget to catch up with all the Strange Justice before you go.

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