My Resimay

June 1, 2015 at 3:13 pm | Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

To hoom it mae consern,

I waunt to apply for the job what I saw in the paper.

I can Type reale quik wit one finggar and do sum a counting..

I think I am good on the phone and I no I am a pepole person;

pepole really seam to respond to me well.

I no my spelling is not to good but find that I Offen can get a job thru my persinalety.

Salerery is open so we can discus wat you want to pay me and wat you think that I am werth,

I can start emeditely. Thank you in advanse fore yore anser.

hopifuly Yore best aplicant so farr.

Sinseerly,

BRIANNA

PS : Because my resimay is a bit short – below is a picktere of me.

Employer’s response:

Dear Brianna ,

It’s OK honey, we’ve got a spell checker. See you Monday.

..

..

THE NEWS

Odd news from around the world

Teenage girl who took a 30-mile cab ride and then refused to pay is ordered to WALK the journey – or face jail: “A teenager who didn’t pay cab fare after a 30 mile journey has been forced to relive every inch of her free ride by walking it. Judge Michael Cicconetti offered 18-year-old Victoria Bascom the long walk or a quick ride to jail for 30 days. Bascom, who didn’t pay for a ride from Cleveland to Painesville, Ohio, began trekking around a local fairground on Friday afternoon. Bascom was ordered to complete her trip within 48 hours, do three days of community service and will also pay United Cab $100 in restitution, according to WOIO. Cicconetti originally opened his sentencing remarks by saying that Bascom would have to spend 30 days in jail, leaving her visibly distraught. The unusual punishments are only offered to those who are first-time offenders and show remorse for their actions. He then offered the creative penalty, and said that a GPS would be used to monitor her movement during the 48 hours.”

British driver collides with truck and destroys his car – yet drives another 40 MILES: “This shocking picture shows a crushed car that was stopped on the motorway – 40 MILES after it drove under a lorry. With its roof buckled and windscreen cracked and ripped from the roof, the silver vehicle appears to be decimated. Incredibly, despite being almost flattened after driving under a lorry at Junction 13 of the M5 near Stroud in Gloucestershire, the driver was stopped at Junction 5 near Droitwich Spa, Worcester – 40 miles on from his car wrecking collision and an hour later. Officers from the West Midlands Central Motorway Police Group pulled the car over and confirmed, amazingly, that everyone escaped without any serious injuries. Passing motorists were left in disbelief as the smashed-up vehicle sped beside them on the busy motorway early this morning. Patrols from both the West Midlands Central Motorway Police Group and Gloucestershire Road Police tracked the car after concerned drivers dialled 999. Gloucestershire Police said a 30-year-old man has been arrested”

Rare Computer Unwittingly Dropped Off at Silicon Valley Recycling Center. Want to Guess How Much It’s Worth?: “The woman dropped off her boxes of old electronics at Clean Bay Area in early April and then left soon after. She had cleared out her garage after her husband died and didn’t want a tax receipt. She left no contact information. Nothing particularly out of the ordinary for the Silicon Valley recycling center. But when the center’s vice president Victor Gichun got a look inside the boxes a few weeks later, he saw something unbelievable. An Apple I (one) computer. Gichun sold the computer in a private auction for $200,000 — but as it’s company policy, he’s looking to split the proceeds with the woman. He said the woman stopped by on a Friday just before closing time and was driving an SUV — but that’s the extent of what he’ll disclose. And all she has to do is show up to the warehouse at 1310 Piper Drive in Milpitas to get the 100 grand. “To prove who she is,” Gichun told the Mercury News, “I just need to look at her.”

Parking cop issues penalty notice to a WHEELBARROW : “These unbelievable pictures show the bizarre moment a jobsworth traffic warden gave a parking ticket to a wheelbarrow. The outrageous photographs, taken yesterday in Leeds, show the warden slapping a penalty charge notice on the wheelbarrow, which was left at the side of the road carrying two paving slabs. It is not clear what traffic offence the owner of the wheelbarrow committed or even if the garden implement actually counts as a vehicle. There are no yellow lines near where the wheelbarrow was left, but there may have been parking restrictions in place on the city centre road. The pictures were posted online by Twitter user @Geezajay2013, who tweeted: ‘Leeds City Council putting a parking ticket on a wheel barrow [sic]. However, another Twitter user suggested that the warden was playing a joke on nearby builders. A Leeds City Council spokeswoman said: ‘We’re not sure this is genuine, but if it is then it appears this individual has been a little overzealous in exercising his duties.'”

Jinxed Airline changing name: “Loss-making Malaysia Airlines is set to ditch its name and up to 6,000 staff in an attempt to restructure the business and move on from two fatal plane crashes. The new company and name will be revealed this week and it will be fully trading by September. Mueller, an airline turnaround specialist, has been drafted in from Irish national carrier Aer Lingus to help Malaysia recover from the two fatal crashes last year. Unions have forced the airline to keep on more staff than needed and it is alleged it has had to hand out contracts to politically connected firms. In March 2014, flight MH370, carrying 239 passengers and crew, disappeared without trace in the Indian Ocean. Then last July, Malaysia Airlines Flight MH17, was shot down over rebel-held territory in eastern Ukraine, killing all 298 on board.

And don’t forget to catch up with all the Strange Justice before you go.

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