A weird joke

July 21, 2014 at 2:29 pm | Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

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THE NEWS

Odd news from around the world

Frustrated husband creates spreadsheet of wife’s excuses for not having sex with him: “A sexually-frustrated husband compiled a spreadsheet charting a whole month’s worth of his wife’s excuses for refusing to have sex with him, including “I might be getting sick” and “I still don’t feel 100%”. The unnamed man then collated the information and put it into an excel document before emailing it to his wife as she arrived at an airport ahead of a 10-day business trip. Shocked at the email, the anonymous lady tried to get in touch with her husband but found he had cut contact with her. In the end, she decided to share her husband’s endeavour with users of social networking site Reddit by uploading the spreadsheet. The spreadsheet, which has since been deleted, quickly went viral with people taking both sides in the debate.
One user said: “Your husband is expressing legitimate concerns in an extremely immature and passive aggressive way. Clearly, the communication style in your relationship is shit. Fix it or don’t, it’s your marriage.” But another user added: “Maybe her husband has got sick and tired of being totally and utterly ignored for months on end, has had enough and wants resolution to the issue. This time, after all attempts, he has got her attention.”

Grandmother who lost her engagement ring 38 years ago finally finds it – thanks to chance glimpse of old photo on Facebook: “A woman who lost her engagement ring 38 years ago after her daughter buried it in the garden has finally been reunited with it thanks to posting an old photo on Facebook. Grandmother Jackie Cook, 66, never expected to see the treasured band again after her daughter Clare buried it in the garden as a three-year-old in 1976. Mrs Cook, and her husband Benjamin, 69, unsuccessfully scoured the grounds of their home. She thought she would never see the ring again but amazingly she was reunited with it this week after the new occupants of her old house found the ring. The find happened after Mrs Cook came across some photos of her old farm where she lived and posted them on Facebook. They were then seen by Toni Crouch, 29, who recognised the farm as her own childhood home. She immediately messaged Mrs Cook, and told her how she had found a gold ring in the back garden of the property when she was a child. She then sent a picture of the jewellery to an overjoyed Mrs Cook, who confirmed it was indeed her long-lost engagement ring.”

Handcuffed naked man jumps into river in attempt to escape police…and ends up being SAVED by officers: “A naked man was saved by police officers Tuesday morning after he reportedly dove into a river during a police chase. Prior to the rescue, the suspect ‘was trying to break into vehicles’ and ‘going from vehicle to vehicle,’ KCTV5 said. Kansas City, Missouri police told the station the man, whom they said was under the influence of drugs and behaving strangely, was arrested and handcuffed before he went into the water. The man tried to run away from police before he ‘ran down the embankment, took his clothes off and jumped into the [Blue River],’ the station said. Video shot by KCTV5 shows the handcuffed man in the water having trouble trying to stay afloat in the river. An officer is seen out of uniform and wearing a tank top swimming toward the man and eventually carrying him through the water. The man was hospitalized, police also said. The man was later identified by KCTV5 as veteran and PTSD sufferer Geoffrey Jenista.

Romanian arrived at his holiday home to find it had disappeared and a field of corn had been planted in its place: “Police in the Romanian port city of Braila got a call from Andy Pascali, 40, complaining that his holiday house on the Danube Delta had been stolen. At first they thought it was a joke, but when they turned up at the nearby village of Baldovinesti they found not only that there was no property where there should have been a three-bedroom building, but that a field of ready-to-harvest corn had been planted in its place. A shocked Mr Pascali, who posted the image of the cornfield on his Facebook page, said: ‘I think this could only happen in Romania. He said the theft should be a warning to anybody who might be thinking about buying a holiday home in the country that they should make regular checks to make sure it was still there. He said that he believed the crooks had probably managed to recycle just about everything after slowly taking the house apart while he was not there. He said the property that he had inherited from his parents who had built it in 1986 had also been fully furnished with a brand-new fitted kitchen and bathroom.

The Hindu pipers of North London: Indian sect’s pipe band: “These pipers are playing in the Guru Purnima, an Indian festival dedicated to spiritual teachers, at a new Hindu temple being built in Kingsbury, North London. As the familiar Highland drone washes over the hundreds of faithful Hindus celebrating the festival, contrapuntally exotic melodies emerge more reminiscent of the Taj Mahal. The Shree Muktajeeven Swamibapa pipe band was established in 1972 in honour of Shree Muktajeeven Swamibapa who, after seeing a performance by a Scottish pipe band in Trafalgar Square, inspired his British disciples to form one. The original nine members in the band – drum major, four pipers, and four snares – were trained by world-renowned pipe band competition judge Major James Caution. There are about 50 members today, all living in the North London area and drawn from the local Hindu community. The Swaminarayan faith, a branch of Hinduism, was established by Lord Shree Swaminarayan, at the end of the 18th century in Northern India.”

And don’t forget to catch up with all the Strange Justice before you go.

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