SPREADING THE WORD

June 6, 2014 at 12:58 pm | Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

Saturday morning the weather was too bad to play golf. I was bored with nothing to do.

There was a knock on the door. I opened it to find a young, well-dressed man standing there who said: “Hello sir, I’m a Jehovah’s Witness.

So I said, “Come in and sit down.”

I offered him a fresh cup of coffee and asked, “What do you want to talk about?”

He said: “Beats me. Nobody ever let me in before.”

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THE NEWS

Odd news from around the world

European bank will shrink your money: The European Central Bank has left the door open for quantitative easing for the first time after cutting interest rates to record lows as part of a package of extraordinary measures aimed at depressing the euro, stimulating economic growth and staving off the threat of deflation. In a raft measures that will be scrutinised by central banks around the world including Australia – and could push the local currency higher – the ECB moved into unchartered territory by becoming the first major central bank to have a negative deposit rate while also proving up to €400 billion in cheap loans to lenders. Much of the package announced in Europe on Thursday—including the negative deposit rate to encourage lending to businesses—was expected by the market”

Secret Service discovers sarcasm: “The US Secret Service is looking to buy software that can spot sarcasm on social media. Yeah, good luck with that. The agency wants to buy software that, among other things, has the ability to “detect sarcasm” and language that may mean something different than it appears on first glance. But getting a computer to detect sarcasm and its linguistic complexities can be difficult – and some experts worry at the prospect of attempts to parse speech by a government agency that has the power to arrest people for posting alleged threats online. Last year, French software firm Spotter said it had developed a tool that detects sarcasm for clients including the British Home Office and the European Commission. Peter Eckersley, technology projects director for the Electronic Frontier Foundation, thinks the Secret Service effort will fail because computers can’t grasp the nuances of language.”

Two people rescued by police after barricading themselves in a bedroom because they were scared of their dog Fluffy: “Two people had to be rescued by police and armed officers after barricading themselves in their bedroom because they got scared of their dog – called Fluffy. The dog owners blocked themselves in the upstairs bedroom of their home in Huddersfield, West Yorkshire, after becoming frightened of their Staffordshire bull terrier’s behaviour. They rang 999 at about 6.30am after the dog started to attack and police, armed officers, fire crews and paramedics were sent to the house. e occupant of the house was injured in the incident and a dog handler seized Fluffy under the Dangerous Dogs Act. ‘We had to put a ladder up to rescue them from the first floor. ‘It was a Staffordshire Bull Terrier called Fluffy and the police dog handler was due to attend.’ A spokesman for West Yorkshire Police said: ‘We were called at 6am to reports a dog was trying to attack a man.”

Austrian billboard companies use doggy smells at the base of signs so that their owners will be forced to linger: “Advertisers have come up with a new way of targeting dog owners – by putting up posters with a whiff of tasty canine treats. The posters have gone on display ‘at paw-level’ in the Austrian capital Vienna and are aimed at enticing pets to have a smell while out on walkies. The adverts have been created by the Austrian billboard specialists Gewista for the Pedigree brand. The hope is that the fragrant posters will make the owners of the capital’s pooches part with their hard-earned cash for the dog snacks. Smaller versions of the poster – which bear the words WUFF RRWAFF WAU! – are also available to cater for the more diminutive pooch, such as the popular dachshund. Dog owners can scan a QR code on the poster and find out details about the product – and sign up for invitations to test dog treats.”

Man who has spent the last 25 years walking backwards for world peace has forgotten how to walk forwards: “A man who has been walking in reverse for 25 years in a bid to achieve world peace has forgotten how to walk forwards. Mani Manithan opted to only travel in reverse in 1989 after a string of violent acts in his home country India shocked him into action. He insists the unusual routine does not interfere with daily life as he has perfected the art of walking backwards up stairs, across roads and while using public transport. One of Mani Manithan’s first acts after making his vow of reverse travel was to walk backwards naked from his hometown to the city of Chennai – a 300 mile journey. But now Mani, who runs a mobile phone shop in Tiruppatur district, Tamil Nadu, revealed he has forgotten how to walk forwards. ‘My life has been full of struggles, sacrifice, achievements and protest so I have no issue continuing my backwards walking until we achieve world peace.’

And don’t forget to catch up with all the Strange Justice before you go.

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