Patient doggie

April 30, 2012 at 6:52 pm | Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

..

..

THE NEWS

Odd news from around the world

Postcard from 1958 finally arrives, via Facebook: “A POSTCARD mailed from Chicago in 1958 has finally reached its intended recipient, but not without a little help from Facebook. The Chicago Sun-Times reports that a postcard depicting Shedd Aquarium recently arrived at Scott McMurry’s Virginia home, more than five decades after his mother mailed it. The 71-year-old says he immediately recognised his mother’s handwriting. The postcard was addressed to Clairmont Lane in Decatur, Georgia, where McMurry grew up. But it recently arrived in Elizabeth Fulcher’s mailbox on Clairmont Lane in South Daytona, Florida. Fulcher posted a picture of the postcard on Facebook and her friends helped track down McMurry. The half-century mail delay remains a mystery.”

Titanic II? “Queensland billionaire mining magnate Clive Palmer has unveiled his plans to build the Titanic II to add to his tourism portfolio. Mr Palmer said his new company Blue Star Line Pty Ltd had commissioned the state-owned Chinese company CSC Jinling Shipyard to build a near replica of the ill-fated Titanic. The cost is unknown. “It will be every bit as luxurious as the original Titanic but of course it will have state-of-the-art 21st century technology and the latest navigation and safety systems,” Mr Palmer said. Mr Palmer said the rebuild was a tribute to the spirit of the men and women who constructed the original Titanic. The Titanic was commissioned by the company White Star Line and was the world’s largest liner, measuring nearly 270 metres long, 53 metres high and weighing approximately 40,000 tonnes. He said the design of the new Titanic would be as close to the original as possible but would have “state of the art engineering” and would run on diesel rather than coal power.”

China to dictate world car design: “The sheer size of the Chinese car market is forcing Western car makers to think about restyling their cars to appeal to Chinese tastes first. As more and more Chinese buy cars, car makers say consumer tastes in the Asian nation have a growing influence on vehicle design the world over. China emerged as the world’s top car market in 2009, and though the sector stalled last year, with sales rising just 2.5 per cent to 18.51 million, carmakers are convinced it is where the industry’s future lies. Manufacturers at this week’s Auto China 2012 exhibition in Beijing said they have started to include features that appeal to the Chinese consumer – from large grilles and highly visible chrome fittings to luxury back seats for the in-laws… The car penetration rate in China is still relatively low but last year, even with the sales slowdown, more cars were sold in the Asian nation than in the United States.”

Navy scraps stealth ship: “It was the world’s first stealth boat, a top secret experimental vessel built for the US Navy in the 1980s at a cost of $190million. Now the Sea Shadow could be yours for a fraction of that price after being put up for sale on an eBay-style website. But don’t expect to sail off on any undercover missions – the 563-ton vessel is being sold for scrap. Production on the vessel was completed in 1985, but the public weren’t aware of its existence until 1993. Measuring 164ft by 70ft and capable of cruising at a maximum of 14 knots, it was developed for the US Navy by an agency of the US Defense Department and Lockheed Martin. But the Navy never commissioned the ship and it was later used to evaluate new technologies in a realistic at-sea environment before languishing in dry dock in California. Sea Shadow has a Swath Water Plane Area Twin Hull (SWATH) design, where the vessel’s angled sides extend below the waterline to torpedo-shaped hulls which gave it exceptional stability in bad weather.”

Two women save boy from father who was trying to CUT OFF HIS ARMS in ritual sacrifice: “Two women saved an eight-year-old boy from being killed by his father who was attempting to cut off his arms as part of a human sacrifice in a cemetery. Jaymisha Pires and Corey Granberry grabbed the badly injured boy after his forearms had been slashed open. Pires, 21, said her ‘motherly instincts’ kicked in when she saw the boy being attacked by his father. Joseph Ramirez was later tackled by a security guard at the cemetery where he had allegedly tried to kill his son. The 30-year-old told police his dead grandmother told him to sacrifice his son. The injured boy was recovering in hospital with knife wounds to his forearms but police said he owes his life to the two have-a-go heroes. Pires said Ramirez kept saying, ‘We’re going to Jesus, we’re going to Jesus.’”

And don’t forget to catch up with all the Strange Justice before you go.

Religious beer

April 29, 2012 at 6:54 pm | Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

There’s more to this than meets the eye. “Hell” is not such a big mystery. It’s just the German word for “light”. But why “Retter”? That’s the German word for “Saviour”. Maybe the German brewer really meant to have fun with us English-speakers. “Schankbier” just means “draft” beer

..

..

THE NEWS

Odd news from around the world

Wedding ring found after two years in sewers: “A WOMAN who lost her wedding ring nearly two years ago has been reunited with it after sewer workers found the ring in a drain and made it their mission to locate its rightful owner. Maura Burke thought she had lost her diamond wedding band after it went down a drain in her home in Massachusetts, in the US, in 2010. Engraved with her initials and those of her husband, Jim, the band also bore the date of their union in November 1991. Despite her daily prayers, the ring never reappeared, and the search was deemed a lost cause. She did not count on Department of Public Works employees spotting the ring in the town of Braintree’s drainage system and making it their mission to find its rightful owner. They located Maura Burke when the initials and date on the ring’s band were cross-checked against the town’s marriage records.”

British Nature lover leaves wildlife haven to animal charity – who sell it to be bulldozed and built on: “The greatest joy in the life of animal enthusiast David Brown was the wild habitat he owned opposite his cottage that was home to foxes, badgers, hedgehogs and squirrels. So when he wrote his will, Mr Brown chose to leave his property to the RSPCA – a charity he trusted. But the RSPCA repaid his trust by selling the land to property developers, and last week, to the horror of his former neighbours, the habitat was flattened – in just 12 hours. For Mr Brown had made one crucial mistake in drawing up his will – he expressed the ‘wish’ that the area be maintained as an animal sanctuary rather than making it a legal condition of the will. This technicality allowed the RSPCA to ignore his wishes and instead cash in by selling both the cottage and the land for £295,000.”

Depiction of ancient Greek myth too much for modern Britain: “A photograph of a naked woman and a swan was taken down after a police officer complained that it appeared to “condone bestiality”, an art gallery has claimed. The Scream gallery in Mayfair had exhibited the artwork for a month with no complaints from the public. The work is intended as modern depiction of the Greek myth of Leda and the Swan. But a Metropolitan police officer who saw the Derrick Santini image from a bus was alarmed. He alerted his colleagues and two uniformed officers went to the gallery. Jag Mehta, the sales director at the gallery, said she spoke to the officers and asked what the problem was. “They said the photograph suggested we condoned bestiality, which was an arrestable offence,” she said. “It’s crazy. Perhaps the cultural references were lost on them.” As the exhibition was already over, they took down the artwork, which shows the animal ravaging the naked woman. According to Greek mythology, the god Zeus took the form of a swan to seduce or rape Leda. She was later said to bear his children, Polydeuces and Helen of Troy.”

Fake “Australian” lottery run by Muslims in Canada snares elderly Americans: “A scam involving a fake multi-million dollar Australian lottery has led to elderly Americans, some with dementia, being fleeced of their life savings, authorities have warned. The scammers, identifying themselves as Australian Government Lottery officials, call or send letters to the elderly claiming they have won tens of millions of dollars, but tell the victims they must wire money to “secret Swiss bank accounts” to cover processing fees. An 89-year-old woman in Hillsborough, California, was duped into wiring $US70,000 to scammers operating out of Vancouver, Canada, in order to collect $US7.5 million in winnings. Californian authorities contacted Canadian police and three alleged Vancouver-based scammers, Nazifa Raza, 27, Saheem Raza, 30, and Fareed Raza, 38, were arrested”

Australian politician gets teargassed: “Independent Senator Nick Xenophon has had teargas fired in his direction during a demonstration for electoral reforms in central Kuala Lumpur. Tens of thousands of demonstrators swamped the Malaysian capital today to demand the reforms, ahead of national polls expected soon. Senator Xenophon, who is in Kuala Lumpur on an international fact-finding mission on election processes in Malaysia, was among the crowds when police fired teargas and chemical-laced water at demonstrators. Until then it had been a peaceful rally that had included chanting and a speech by Malaysia’s opposition leader Anwar Ibrahim, Senator Xenophon said. “The police have just let off canister after canister of teargas,” he said soon after the demonstration was broken up. “People have been injured. People are fainting.”

And don’t forget to catch up with all the Strange Justice before you go.

Monkey versus cat

April 28, 2012 at 12:56 pm | Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

The monkey is a Thai Gibbon. I wish I could leap around like that

..

..

THE NEWS

Odd news from around the world

Dumb British robber stopped for coffee: “Initially, using an imitation gun, Davis who admitted robbery and having an imitation firearm with criminal intent, tried to rob a security guard making deliveries to the Cecil Square branch of the bank two days before Christmas last year. But the court was told the guard had no money in the box he was carrying so Davis forced him into the bank and threatened to shoot him unless he was given money. He was handed £2,300 and fled, dropping money, as he went. Then, instead of making a getaway, the court heard that he went to Carton’s cafe in the Centre opposite the bank where he used one of the stolen £20 notes to buy coffee. He was still sitting there when police arrived at the bank and were told he had gone into the cafe. Officers arrested him in the cafe.”

Ultra-loyal Australian politician: “The MP for Maribyrnong left viewers in stitches after a seemingly innocuous interview with Sky News in Australia had hilarious results. He clearly took the time-honoured doctrine of collective cabinet responsibility a little too far by backing up his party leader’s comments – even though he hadn’t heard them. Asked whether he felt the parliamentary speaker, Peter Slipper, should be allowed to go back to his job after being accused of sexual harassment and misuse of funds, Mr Shorten said: ‘I haven’t seen what she’s said, but let me say I support what it is she said.’ The astonished present pressed him on that, to which Mr Shorten replied: ‘I support what she said … My view is what the prime minister’s view is.’”

The duck who thinks he is a dog: “Wayne O’Donnell takes his pet duck Boris with him everywhere, including to the pub for a pint. And the sleek white Aylesbury likes nothing better than showing off his party trick …. of balancing on his owner’s head. That’s if he’s not waddling by his side down the street or being driven around in the passenger seat of his car. Mr O’Donnell, a caravan technician, has had Boris since he was a bundle of day-old yellow fluff. And where he goes, Boris goes. Four years on Mr O’Donnell, of Romsey, Hampshire, even took his duck on summer holiday to a villa in Barcelona. There they strolled on the sand in the Spanish sun and were the talk of local bars and restaurants. ‘It was brilliant because I could take him everywhere – the streets were narrow so he could walk around, he even came on the beach,’ said Mr O’Donnell, 41. ‘People sort of look gobsmacked when they see me and Boris, they can’t work it out. ‘They say to me “why have you got a duck?” and I say “why have you got a dog?”.”

Are men stupid?: “Are men stupid? How else can we explain the endless parade of otherwise successful individuals, who by all appearances seem intelligent and competent, and yet risk destroying their careers and their personal lives over the chance to have a sexual escapade? John Edwards crashing from the heights of promise to infamy, from presidential candidate to defendant in a trial after a secret affair; Secret Service agents ending their careers in disgrace over dalliances with prostitutes in Colombia, all join that long procession of men who managed to self-destruct, pulling a pin on the grenade of their careers and perhaps their personal lives for the sake of a little fun. The pageant of legacy-killing misjudgment includes a president, several might-have-been presidents, a few governors, a World Bank director, a former Dutch prime minister, an Israeli president and one of the top golfers of all time. And that is only a partial list. I believe the common denominator, the proximate cause of the irrational behavior, is arrogance; the belief by some powerful men that they can get away with it.”

British Keystone Kops again: “Police officers must be used to putting their lives on the line while doing their duties. But some officers at Staffordshire Police don’t even seem to be able to make it out of the car park without having a prang – they crashed police cars within their own car parks nearly 50 times in the space of a year. The 48 insurance claims were among 487 made by Staffordshire Police in 2011/12, with 45 involving officers who crashed into the back of a car while 61 involved ‘errors of misjudgement’ on the road. Since 2006 the force has had 347 accidents in police station car parks resulting in an insurance claim, Staffordshire Police Authority heard at a meeting this week. Nigel Bowers, an ex-advanced driving instructor for Staffordshire Police, said: ‘Years and years ago, if you so much as got a scratch on a police car you would be banned from driving for a week. ‘I think standards have dropped and it’s not just in Staffordshire, it’s across the whole country.’”

And don’t forget to catch up with all the Strange Justice before you go.

He sure did

April 27, 2012 at 5:39 pm | Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

..

..

THE NEWS

Odd news from around the world

Brainless Scottish police: “An ambulance driver has been fined and had points put on his licence – after speeding to save a child’s life. Andy Thomson was taking a child’s liver for an emergency transplant operation in Leeds when he was caught doing 84mph on the A1 in Scotland. The father-of-three had expected to be let off because of his job but he was given a £60 fine and three points on his licence. He had been driving a private ambulance – but, despite working for the NHS, he says police did not recognise his as an emergency vehicle. Andy, 46, from Blyth, Northumberland, said: ‘I think it’s an absolute disgrace. ‘We’re now going to have to switch off our blue lights and go through that stretch at 70mph even if it is an emergency. ‘That is going to cost somebody their life if there’s too much delay on one of these organs,’ said Andy, who was driving a private ambulance for Lifeline Medical Transport Services. His journey took him to St James’s Hospital in Leeds just in time for a seriously ill child’s liver transplant to go ahead on October 8, 2011.

More strange Scottish cops: “A POLICEMAN has been charged with abducting two girls and making them stand handcuffed without shoes in manure. Constable Robert Ovenstone, 30, is alleged to have taken the 15-year-olds from a children’s home on July 19 last year. It’s claimed he took them in a police vehicle to a farm in Easter Ross. And he is accused of compelling them to stand in animal manure while in their stocking soles in a barn. He is also accused of, after removing the cuffs, making them walk down a farmtrack in darkness still without shoes. Ovenstone and his co-accused, constable Stuart Kelman, 29, are also alleged to have behaved in a threatening or abusive manner towards the teenagers in the barn at Balintraid Farm, at Delny, Invergordon. The case against the two men was called at Tain Sheriff Court on Monday and was continued without plea until May 21.”

Another dog that was nearly lunch: “Playfully bounding through a field on his daily walk, Vinnie was blissfully unaware that his life was under threat. For high above him, a red kite had decided the 4lb Pomeranian dog looked an appetising prospect for lunch. Moving into an attack position, the 2ft-long bird of prey swooped. And it would have claimed its prize had it not been for the swift intervention of Vinnie’s owner, Kate Hillman, who rushed to the rescue. The fashion model grabbed her five-year-old pet with the bird just a few feet away – but the drama was not over. Moments later the kite returned and tried to steal the dog from her arms. ‘My heart was really pounding,’ she said. ‘I picked Vinnie up but the bird wouldn’t leave us alone. The car was 300 yards away and I was fighting the bird off the whole way.”

Unwanted pearl earrings which sat in a drawer for 35 years treble their estimate price and sell for £1.6million: “The jewels had been a gift from an exiled Romanian King to his mistress, who left them to a British woman friend in Wiltshire upon her death in 1977. The unnamed woman had no idea of their worth so she discarded them in the back of a desk drawer for years as the oversized jewels were not to her taste. They were later inherited by her nephew and his wife but they never touched them, until by chance they mentioned the jewels to auctioneers. The stunned experts described the long earrings ‘as the finest in existence’ and said it was a once in a life-time discovery. They eventually went under the hammer at Woolley and Wallis salerooms in Salisbury for £1.4million pounds.”

Early motorbike: “It may look like an ordinary bicycle, but this is fact one of the world’s first motorbikes that dates back to the Victorian era. The motorbike, which is more than one hundred years old, consists of an engine simply attached to a bicycle’s back wheel with a fuel tank hanging under the crossbar. The distinctive ‘Motor-Wheel’ was patented in 1899 and is built upon a classic Singer bicycle frame, which are collector’s items in their own right. The makers, Edwin Perks and Harold Birch, were astonishingly ahead of their time and also invented the world’s first cast alloy wheel. The motorbike is a rare survivor and auctioneers expect an abundance of motoring enthusiasts when it goes on sale. But while it may be a piece of classic motoring history, the Motor-Wheel wasn’t the most comfortable way to travel, as drivers would feel every bump on uneven roads. It also isn’t very fast – with the four-stroke engine’s top speed being little more than a brisk walking pace.”

And don’t forget to catch up with all the Strange Justice before you go.

A certain logic ….

April 26, 2012 at 3:31 pm | Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

..

..

THE NEWS

Odd news from around the world

Solar power fail: “Geneva’s Swiss newspaper Tages-Anzeiger reports that a woman starved to death after embarking on a spiritual diet that required her to stop eating or drinking and live off sunlight alone. The Zurich newspaper reported Wednesday that the unnamed Swiss woman in her fifties decided to follow the radical fast in 2010 after viewing an Austrian documentary about an Indian guru who claims to have lived this way for 70 years. Tages-Anzeiger says there have been similar cases of self-starvation in Germany, Britain and Australia. The prosecutor’s office in the Swiss canton of Aargau confirmed Wednesday that the woman died in January 2011 in the town of Wolfhalden in eastern Switzerland.”

Woman’s fingers trapped in money machine: “An elderly woman needed to be rescued when she managed to get three fingers stuck in an ATM. Security guards found the woman with three fingers stuck inside the machine this morning at Sydney’s Campbelltown Hospital. “I’ve been in the job 37 years and never had one of these. She was in the main foyer of Campbelltown Hospital with the little finger, well three fingers, stuck up inside where the money comes out,” firefighter Steve Webb told ABC Radio. “There were about six security guys and four firies and we couldn’t understand how it had happened. “After we prised the front panel away from the whole machine, it was just enough for her to release her hand herself.”

Creative types are more likely to be dishonest: “Creative types are normally considered to be upstanding members of society – there aren’t too many artists, composers or novelists featured on Crimewatch, after all. However a new study by Harvard University and Duke University in North Carolina has found that there is in fact a link between being creative – and being dishonest. Lead researcher Francesca Gino said: ‘Greater creativity helps individuals solve difficult tasks across many domains, but creative sparks may lead individuals to take unethical routes when searching for solutions to problems and tasks.’ Gino and her co-author, Dan Ariely, of Duke University in North Carolina, conducted a series of five experiments to test their thesis that more creative people would cheat under circumstances where they could justify their bad behaviour.”

99-year-old divorces wife after he discovered 1940s affair: “An Italian couple are to become the world’s oldest divorcees, after the 99-year-old husband found that his 96-year-old wife had an affair in the 1940s. The Italian man, identified by lawyers in the case only as Antonio C, was rifling through an old chest of drawers when he made the discovery a few days before Christmas. Notwithstanding the time that had elapsed since the betrayal, he was so upset that he immediately confronted his wife of 77 years, named as Rosa C, and demanded a divorce. Guilt-stricken, she reportedly confessed everything but was unable to persuade her husband to reconsider his decision. She wrote the letters to her lover during a secret affair in the 1940s, according to court papers released in Rome this week. The couple are now preparing to split, despite the ties they forged over nearly eight decades – they have five children, a dozen grandchildren and one great-grand child.”

Eagle snatches dog: “A BRITISH woman said yesterday she was forced to fight off a giant eagle which swooped down and tried to fly off with one of her dogs while she hiked a trail on Spain’s southern coastline. Actress Suzanne Dodd, 43, recalled to The (London) Daily Telegraph how the bird of prey grabbed one of her two Jack Russell terriers as they walked near Benalmadena on Saturday afternoon. “Suddenly this enormous bird swooped across the path. With one talon it grabbed her nose and the other her collar and I thought that was it for the dog but it struggled for a moment and I moved in,” she said. “I had just a moment to act and grabbed hold of its enormous wing. It turned and bit me but released the dog.” Dodd, who lives in Benalmadena, said the failed attempt didn’t stop the eagle from trying again as she ran with her dogs for cover. “It swooped down on us about 20 times,” she said. “It was a surreal and terrifying experience.”

And don’t forget to catch up with all the Strange Justice before you go.

Little Johnny strikes again

April 25, 2012 at 4:51 pm | Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

The teacher asked the class to use the word ‘fascinate’ in a sentence.

Molly put up her hand and said, ‘My family went to my granddad’s farm and we all saw his pet sheep. It was fascinating.’

The teacher said, ‘That was good, but I wanted you to use the word fascinate, not fascinating’.

Sally raised her hand. She said, ‘My family went to see Rock City and I was fascinated.’

The teacher said, ‘Well, that was good Sally, but I wanted you to use the word ‘fascinate.’

Little Johnny raised his hand. The teacher hesitated because she had been burned by Little Johnny before. She finally decided there was no way he could damage the word ‘fascinate’, so she called on him for his offering.

Johnny said, ‘My aunt Gina has a sweater with ten buttons, but her tits are so big she can only fasin eight.’ The teacher gave up

..

..

THE NEWS

Odd news from around the world

Man killed while urinating on Chicago subway: “Zachary McKee, 27, died after coming into contact an electrified third rail while relieving himself at a subway stop in Evanston, Illinois, last night. According to local police McKee clambered down onto the track at South Boulevard station and fell onto the rails at around 11pm. A companion alerted subway security but were too late to save him. He was pronounced dead less than an hour later at Saint Francis Hospital in Evanston. It is not clear whether McKee urinated directly onto the third rail but, contrary to popular belief, the practice is unlikely to result in death. Many of the deaths reported to have been caused by people peeing onto electric tracks were actually the result of stepping or falling onto the rail.”

A Chinese MG? “The global boom in faux-wheel-drives knows no bounds. Iconic British sports car brand MG – now owned by the Chinese – has put its name to a vehicle that’s best described as a cross between a Mini and a Nissan Juke (a high-riding, overtly-styled hatchback sold in Europe). The MG Icon concept car unveiled at the Beijing Motor Show this week is further proof drivers the world over are embracing vehicles with tall driving positions. The more people buy high-riding four (and faux) wheel drives, it seems the more people want to join them. The vehicle was designed by a Briton, Anthony Williams-Kenny.”

Another good doggie: “A boy impaled on a metal fence was saved after a real-life Lassie drew his owner’s attention to the child’s plight. Jack Humphrey, 11, became impaled on the 8ft fence by his wrist when he fell while climbing a nearby tree. In shock, he tried to jump down from the fence, tearing his arm to the bone from elbow to wrist. Spike, who was being walked by James Harrigan on land between North Ormesby and Longlands Road, in Middlesbrough, Cleveland, ran off in the direction of the injured boy. The barking dog alerted his owner to Jack’s distress and Mr Harrigan, 39, held the child in the air for 40 minutes until the emergency services arrived. Mr Harrigan, who lives close to Jack in North Ormesby, Middlesbrough, but didn’t know him before the accident, said: ‘Spike just shot off right to where the boys were. He was like Lassie. ‘I followed him and when I got there, there was a boy on the fence saying he was stuck.”

G-spot ‘does exist’: “Men and women have been trying to find it for centuries. Some doubt it even exists. But now a doctor claims to have found proof that the elusive G-spot is actually real. Dr Adam Ostrzenski, a gynaecologist, said he had confirmed the “anatomic existence” of the G-spot, which was just half the size of a fingernail. Writing in the Journal of Sexual Medicine, Dr Ostrzenski of the Institute of Gynecology in St. Petersburg, Florida, said it was a “well-delineated sac structure” on the perineal membrane, precisely 8.1mm long and 3.6mm wide. He concluded: “This study confirmed the anatomic existence of the G-spot, which may lead to a better understanding and improvement of female sexual function.” The G-spot was named after Ernst Grafenberg, a German gynaecologist who claimed to have discovered it in 1950. The theory has been maintained ever since by sex therapists, who have claimed some women need coaching to find it and experience the full pleasure of sex.”

A real fatcat: “MEOW the cat might have the world’s least original name but he’s got bigger (ahem) problems. He’s possibly the world’s fattest cat. The orange and white tabby tips the scales at nearly 18 kilograms, and the Santa Fe Animal Shelter in New Mexico is on a mission to get him back into shape. Shelter spokesman Ben Swan said Meow’s 87-year-old owner could no longer take care of him, so the two-year-old cat was turned over to a southeastern New Mexico shelter that called Santa Fe for help. Meow is going on a special diet so he can shed some pounds and go up for adoption. Mr Swan said the cat has a sweet demeanor but cannot play for very long because he loses his breath due to the extra weight. But he added it remained unclear how Meow got so big in his short life.”

And don’t forget to catch up with all the Strange Justice before you go.

Balance

April 24, 2012 at 2:07 pm | Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

God was missing for six days. Eventually, Michael, the archangel, found him, resting on the seventh day. He inquired, — “Where have you been?”

God smiled deeply and proudly pointed downwards through the clouds,—- “Look, Michael. Look what I’ve made.” Archangel Michael looked puzzled, and said, —- “What is it?”

“It’s a planet,” — replied God, — and I’ve put life on it. I’m going to call it Earth and it’s going to be a place to test ‘Balance.’”

“Balance?” — inquired Michael, —- “I’m still confused.”

God explained, pointing to different parts of Earth. “For example,northern Europe will be a place of great opportunity and wealth, while southern Europe is going to be poor. Over here I’ve placed a continent of white people, and over there is a continent of black people. Balance in all things…”

God continued pointing to different countries. — “This one will be extremely hot, while this one will be very cold and covered in ice.”

The Archangel , impressed by God’s work, then pointed to a land area and said, — “What’s that one?” “That’s Florida, the most glorious place on earth. There are beautiful trees and gardens, a beautiful swamp, and days filled with sunshine. The people from Florida are going to be handsome, modest,intelligent, and humorous, and they are going to travel the world. They will be extremely sociable, hardworking, high achieving, carriers of peace, and producers of good things.”

Michael gasped in wonder and admiration, but then asked, — “But what about balance, God? You said there would be ‘balance.’”

God smiled, — “I will create Washington DC. Wait till you see the idiots I’ll put there.”……………

..

..

THE NEWS

Odd news from around the world

Jinxed ship?: “The inaugural sailing of Saga Cruises’ newest ship has ended in farce after engine trouble forced the early abandonment of the voyage. It was the latest in a series of mishaps involving Saga Sapphire. Problems began in March when strike action at the Fincantieri shipyard in Italy, where the ship (previously named MS Bleu de France) was undergoing a multi-million-pound refit, delayed its arrival in Southampton for the start of its maiden voyage. A new, shorter itinerary arranged – but this, too, was disrupted when the ship was held for an extra night in Southampton for final tests to be carried out. And while staff were taking part in practice drills in Southampton, two crew members fell overboard – both were wearing life jackets and were unharmed. Finally, the cruise had to be curtailed unexpectedly at Valencia last weekend, when a fault developed in the cooling system of one of Sapphire’s engines.” [Old salts believe that some ships can be jinxed]

The woman who weeps diamonds: “A mother has told how she is left in agony whenever she cries — because her tears contain razor-sharp “diamond” crystals. Jody Smith, 35, suffers from cystinosis, a rare inherited disease which causes a build- up of an acid called cystine. It forms as tiny crystals, which gather in her heart and lungs and fall from her eyes whenever they water, sparkling like jewels. Speaking about her illness for the first time, Jody said: “My doctor and husband say the crystals look like beautiful diamonds, but to me they’re a painful nuisance. “I know they sound lovely but it’s really awful, especially when the sun’s in my eyes. It feels like I’ve got sand in them.” There is no cure for cystinosis, which takes its toll on sufferers’ kidney function.”

Hyenas fought off by elephant mother in life or death struggle in Africa: “The dramatic moment an elephant mother fought off a pack of hyenas to protect her tiny calf has been caught on film by a stunned group of tourists. The life and death struggle began as the hyena pack pounced on the unsuspecting calf when it became separated from the herd. As the hungry predators jumped on its back the, enraged mother attacked, charging repeatedly, kicking out her feet and swinging her massive trunk to save her calf as the circling hyenas tried to bring it down. The brutal encounter left the watching tourists emotionally drained, but guides told them later that the calf had lost its tail in the fight, but had lived to fight another day.”

The face of horror: “Oscar-winner Jennifer Hudson broke down in tears while testifying at the trial of the man [above] accused of killing her mother, brother and seven-year-old nephew in a jealous rage four years ago. Hudson was the first witness called after prosecutors and attorneys for William Balfour finished their opening statements. During her brief but emotional testimony in a Chicago court, she told jurors her family didn’t want her sister to marry Balfour and she spoke about the last time she saw her family members. Her voice also broke as she described her reaction when her sister, Julia Hudson, told her she was going to marry Balfour. “None of us wanted her to marry him,” she said, her voice cracking and struggling to hold back tears. “We did not like how he treated her,” she said. Balfour has pleaded not guilty to three counts of first-degree murder in the October 2008 slayings.”

Borat boosts Kazakh tourism: “A senior Kazakh official has credited the comedy film Borat for helping increase tourism in the Central Asian state, the news agency Tengrinews reports. British comedian Sacha Baron Cohen created the fictional character Borat, purportedly a Kazakh reporter, for the 2006 satirical film that represented Kazakhs as misogynist, racist and stupid. But Kazakhstan has increased the number of tourist visas tenfold since the release of Cohen’s movie, Foreign Minister Yerzhan Kazykhanov said. Kazakhstan’s authoritarian leadership in the months after the movie came called Cohen’s depiction of the ignorant and bigoted Borat as insulting, and not typical of residents of the energy-rich country.”

And don’t forget to catch up with all the Strange Justice before you go.

Meet some of your fellow voters

April 23, 2012 at 3:40 pm | Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

My daughter and I went through the McDonald’s driveway window and I gave the cashier a $5 note. Our total was $4.25, so I also handed her 25c. She said, ‘you gave me too much money.’ I said,’Yes I know, but this way you can just give me a dollar coin back.’ She sighed and went to get the manager who asked me to repeat my request. I did so, and he handed me back the 25c, and said ‘We’re sorry but we don’t do that kind of thing.’ The cashier then proceeded to give me back 75 cents in change.

We had to have the garage door repaired. The repairman told us that one of our problems was that we did not have a ‘large’ enough motor on the opener. I thought for a minute, and said that we had the largest one made at that time, a 1/2 horsepower. He shook his head and said, ‘You need a 1/4 horsepower.’ I responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4 and he said, ‘NOOO, it’s not. Four is larger than two.’

I live in a semi rural area. We recently had a new neighbour call the local council P & W office to request the removal of the DEER CROSSING sign on our road. The reason: ‘Too many deer are being hit by cars out here! I don’t think this is a good place for them to be crossing anymore.’

My daughter went to a Mexican takeaway and ordered a taco. She asked the person behind the counter for ‘minimal lettuce.’ He said he was sorry, but they only had iceberg lettuce.

I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee asked, ‘Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?’ To which I replied, ‘If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?’ He smiled knowingly and nodded, ‘That’s why we ask.’

..

..

THE NEWS

Odd news from around the world

UT: Clerk tells robber ‘You’d better be a good shot’: “Michael Gagon walked into Fresh Market along 880 West North Temple, said he had a gun in his belt and demanded money. The clerk grabbed a crowbar and replied, “You’d better be a good shot.” Police say the suspect Michael Gagon sped away in a stolen car. He faces several charges including robbery, fleeing and trespassing. He drove a stolen four door Pontiac car to a dead end in the area if 340 North 1780 West. Gagon is accused of getting out of his car and running into back yards to get away. Neighbors watched from their windows and even walked out into the street to get a better look at the suspect as he ran from police. He even allegedly ran through a home as the people inside sat and watched in shock. Police finally tackled him in a yard and arrested him.”

‘Anger Room’? “It may sound like a perfectly safe solution for those erupting with anger and an impulse to lash out. Instead of releasing tension by destroying things in your own home – or taking it out on a loved one – a Texas business called the ‘Anger Room’ is providing a space for customers to smash, bash and break everything in sight. As CBS News reports, founder Donna Alexander began the business out of her garage in 2008 to provide a non-traditional form of stress relief after dealing first-hand with hard-to-control anger. But within the last four years the popularity of her services have led her to expand to a Dallas storefront. According to the ‘Anger Room’ website, for $25 customers are allowed five minutes in a mock room that simulates an actual workplace, living area or kitchen – complete with dummies, mannequins, televisions and other breakable items.After donning a protective jumpsuit, face mask, hard hat and goggles, they are allowed inside for an uninterrupted session of unleashing.

Research proves that people look best from their left side: “Both men and women are perceived as more attractive when pictured on their left side as opposed to their right. Though the theory may not be new, as it dates back to the time of oil paintings when subjects tended to tilt their head to show more of the left side of their face, it works just as well for current technology. The study, conducted by Wake Forest University psychology professor James Schirillo and co-authored by Kelsey Blackburn, asked a group of participants to look at a group of photos. The black and white pictures of the men and women were shown in their original form, and then digitally altered so that they were shown from the other side. Overall, the left-sided portraits were the favorites of the collection and prompted favorable reactions from the viewers.”

Single women bussed into Spanish town to combat wife shortage: “Inspired by a classic Hollywood western, dozens of single women have been bussed into a small Spanish town in a desperate attempt to stem a severe bride shortage which is threatening to decimate the local population. The small town of 6,000 on the banks of the picturesque Lobera River, hosted a weekend fiesta to welcome 68 women for a meet-and-greet with the village’s single men. The group, Asocamu, was set up in 1995 to promote rural re-population by organizing parties for single men and woman, but Spain’s painful financial crisis and the lure of city jobs has made the need more pressing than ever, Manuel Gozalo, one of the organizers, said Sunday. Large swathes of central and northern Spain are at risk of depopulation. In the small agricultural communities of Spain’s central plain single, male residents were finding the loneliness too tough to endure, Gozalo said.”

America still a “can do” country: “The two employees of New Jersey’s largest utility company PSE&G are filmed on their way to fix a high voltage power line. Nothing odd about that, you may say. However, not only is the power line live – carrying 230,000 volts – but they are also fixing it from a helicopter which flies inches from the line. The pilot and his colleague, Ryan Hill, are sent to fix a section of the line between Philadelphia and New York City. But because the power lines serve 400,000 people, the line cannot be closed down, meaning the work needs to be done while the line is live. The video shows Mr Hill – who is perched on the side of the helicopter – bonding onto the line with a special metal implement. This means the powerful current flows around the helicopter so he can safely work on the line. But it requires extreme skill from the pilot because if the helicopter touches anything else, like a tree or another power line, then they will all be instantly electrocuted.”

And don’t forget to catch up with all the Strange Justice before you go.

The baby who loves vacuum cleaners!

April 22, 2012 at 6:53 pm | Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

..

..

THE NEWS

Odd news from around the world

Burglar jumps from window, knocks himself unconscious: “Two men have been detained by police after they were found inside a Bassendean medical centre and one man jumped from a window, knocking himself unconscious. Police attended the medical centre on Old Perth Rd after multiple alarms were tripped and saw two males carrying bags inside the premises. When the two men saw police they fled with one man jumping from a second-floor window, knocking himself unconscious when he landed. He also received lacerations to his body, and was taken to Royal Perth Hospital for treatment. The second male, aged 25 years, ran from the centre and hid on a nearby building site. He was found hiding under roof timbers after a police dog tracked him down.”

The owl and the lurcher: “The owl and the pussycat may seem like a natural combination thanks to Edward Lear’s famous nonsense poem. But the sight of an owl and a dog teaming up is still enough to raise a few eyebrows. Willow the barn owl grabbing a lift on the back of lurcher Merlin is now a familiar sight at the Pen y Bryn Falconry centre in Llanfihangel Glyn Myfyr, North Wales. Three months ago, Willow’s handler, college student Lowri Peacock, began combining Willow’s daily exercise with Merlin’s walk. When the bird had finished flying, Ms Peacock sat one-year-old Willow on the dog’s back. And rather than complaining, Merlin clearly enjoyed carrying his feathered passenger. Now the owl gets daily lifts from his canine companion. Ms Peacock said that when Merlin sets off for a run, Willow loves riding on his back with her wings outstretched to keep her balance. She said: ‘They are inseparable. People always stop and smile when they see them going by.’”

The God spots revealed: Scientists find areas of the brain responsible for spirituality: “Scientists have speculated for years that the human brain features a ‘God spot,’ one distinct area of the brain responsible for spirituality. Now, University of Missouri researchers have completed research that indicates spirituality is a complex phenomenon and that multiple areas of the brain are responsible for the many aspects of spiritual experiences. The new work is based on a previously published study that indicated spiritual transcendence is associated with decreased right parietal lobe functioning. Missouri University (MU) researchers replicated their findings. In addition, the researchers determined that other aspects of spiritual functioning are related to increased activity in the frontal lobe. ‘We have found a neuropsychological basis for spirituality, but it’s not isolated to one specific area of the brain,’ said Brick Johnstone, professor of health psychology”

Toronto church advertises for a Welsh-speaking vicar to help preserve the culture in Canada: “A church in Canada is searching for a new vicar – but he must be able to speak Welsh. The 300-strong congregation at the Dewi Sant (St David) United Church in Toronto is made up of Welsh expats but their minister has returned home. A spokesman said: ‘We want to continue and grow the Welsh culture in Toronto. We are an active and lively Welsh church and our mission is to help preserve and celebrate Welsh culture in Canada.’ The church, set up in 1907 by two Christians from North Wales, holds services in Welsh and even teaches the language to new worshippers. Latest census figures for Toronto show there are about 50,000 people living in the city who identify themselves as Welsh.”

Man jumps off yacht to avoid police and dies: “A man has died after jumping from a yacht when police came to question him about a minor assault. The man was on board a yacht at Shute Harbour Marina, near Airlie Beach, about 9:20am when police tried to coax him to come to shore from the beach. The 51-year-old man began to steer the yacht towards police but he jumped overboard and failed to resurface. Police and paramedics tried to rescue the man but he died at the scene.”

And don’t forget to catch up with all the Strange Justice before you go.

The Delivery

April 21, 2012 at 5:39 pm | Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

A married couple went to the hospital to have their baby delivered.

Upon their arrival, the doctor said that the hospital was testing an amazing new high-tech machine that would transfer a portion of the mother’s labor pain to the baby’s Father.

He asked if they were interested. Both said they were very much in favor of it.

The doctor set the pain transfer to 10% for starters, explaining that even 10% was probably more pain than the father had ever experienced Before.

But as the labor progressed, the husband felt fine and asked the doctor to go ahead and kick it up a notch.

The doctor then adjusted the machine to 20% pain transfer. The husband was still feeling fine.

The doctor then checked the husband’s blood pressure and was amazed at how well he was doing.

At this point they decided to try for 50%. The husband continued to feel quite well.

Since the pain transfer was obviously helping the wife considerably, the husband encouraged the doctor to transfer ALL the pain to him.

The wife delivered a healthy baby with virtually no pain and the husband had experienced none. She and her husband were ecstatic.

When they got home they found the parcel delivery man dead on the porch.

..

..

THE NEWS

Odd news from around the world

Chinese company names line of sunglasses after Helen Keller: “Helen Keller may be an icon for overcoming adversity and a pioneer for the disabled, but for some she is more notable as a commercial opportunity. A Chinese company has drawn international attention by naming a line of sunglasses after the deaf-blind activist. The baffling decision may seem like the result of cultural confusion, an example of an Asian firm picking a random English phrase to appear hip. However, since Keller’s story is taught in many Chinese schools, it is unlikely that no one at the company understood who she was. So it seems they must have taken a deliberate decision to exploit her positive image for their business. Helen Keller sunglasses are marketed as a fashionable, high-end product which confers instant cool on the wearer.”

Britain’s most beautiful face?: “The 18-year-old student is blessed with what is described as the perfect face. It matches an international blueprint for the optimum ratio between eyes, mouth, forehead and chin, endowing her with flawless proportions. In theory, that needn’t necessarily cause her to appear anything more than symmetrical (in which department, incidentally, she is also faultless). But the blue-eyed blonde’s mathematical dimensions have just added up to success in a competition to find Britain’s most naturally beautiful face. Florence, who has a Saturday job in a seaside chip shop in between studying for her A-levels, beat 8,000 entrants to win the title. Contestants were judged without make-up and were barred entry if they had had plastic surgery or chemical enhancement.”

Bugatti Veyron supercar made of PORCELAIN: “It must require nerves of steel to drive a £1.6million one-off porcelain supercar through Paris’ notoriously congested streets, let alone parallel park it. The super-wealthy owner of this astonishing Veyron L’Or Blanc – or White Gold – must have breathed a sigh of relief when it arrived at the hotel unscathed. This unique edition of the 253mph, 1,000bhp car – created in conjunction with a firm that usually makes tea pots – had never been seen on the road in Europe. The £1.6 million L’or Blanc edition of the Veyron Super Sport model was built by Bugatti with help from a German ceramics company better known for making high-end tea sets. As well as its swirly porcelain white and blue paint work, its exterior features filler caps, badges and wheel caps made from specially constructed from the material. Bugatti’s design experts came with the psychedelic blue and white paintjob as a tribute to the ‘Stelvio Pass’, a legendary stretch of road in Italy.”

Firm fires more than 1,300 workers by mistake: “The latest board shake-up at Aviva is radical, but not as radical as sacking its entire workforce by email. The email instructed all Aviva Investor workers to hand over company property and security passes on their way out of the building. More than 1,300 workers at Aviva Investors, the insurer’s asset management arm, were shocked on Friday to receive an exit email from the HR department. There was a stunned silence at the London headquarters as staff across the division read the unsympathetic memo – intended for just one employee. The terse communication reminded staff not to spill any company secrets. Minutes later staff were relieved to receive a grovelling message from HR apologising for the blanket email.”

Want to cheer yourself up? go for a walk in a cemetery: “Thinking about death can actually be a good thing as it leads people to bring positive changes to their lives and help others, a new report showed yesterday. For an awareness of mortality can improve physical health and help us re-prioritize our goals and values, according to the latest analysis of recent scientific studies. Even non-conscious thinking about death – such as walking by a cemetery – could prompt positive changes and promote helping others, say psychologists. The report says that past research suggests that thinking about death is destructive and dangerous, fueling everything from prejudice and greed to violence. Such studies related to terror management theory, which posits that we uphold certain cultural beliefs to manage our feelings of mortality, have rarely explored the potential benefits of death awareness.”

And don’t forget to catch up with all the Strange Justice before you go.

Next Page »

Blog at WordPress.com. | The Pool Theme.
Entries and comments feeds.

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 28 other followers