Wicked Thoughts

Three men died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at the pearly gates.

‘In honour of this holy season’ Saint Peter said, ‘You must each possess something that symbolizes Christmas to get into heaven.’

The first man fumbled through his pockets and pulled out a lighter. He flicked it on. ‘It represents a candle’, he said.

‘You may pass through the pearly gates’ Saint Peter said.

The second man reached into his pocket and pulled out a set of keys. He shook them and said, ‘They’re bells.’

Saint Peter said ‘You may pass through the pearly gates’.

The third man started searching desperately through his pockets and finally pulled out a pair of women’s panties.

St. Peter looked at the man with a raised eyebrow and asked, ‘And just what do those symbolize?’

The man replied, ‘These are Carol’s.’

THE NEWS

Rio bans coconuts on its beaches: “One of the enduring images of Rio’s beaches – coconuts opened to yield their sweet water – is about to be a thing of the past under a new clean-up campaign by authorities. The environment secretariat of the host city of the 2014 soccer World Cup and the 2016 Olympic Games has decreed that the big green fruit beloved by thirsty residents and tourists alike is an unhygienic eye-sore and its sale by vendors will be banned from December 1. ”Go on Ipanema beach at the end of the day and you’ll see a mountain of coconuts that people have left on the sand. What attracts rats most to the beach are coconut husks,” the official in charge of the beaches, Jovanildo Savastano, said. Up to 30 tonnes of empty coconuts are recovered every day, he said. Some environmentalists argue however that the fruit is biodegradable and presents no negative ecological impact. Its liquid is also excellent for health, they say. Beachgoers with a craving for coconut juice will still be able to slake their thirst, but only by buying it in receptacles like bottles – or industrially made, in cans. ”This ban favours companies more than the people,” one environmentalist, Gerhard Sardo, said, stressing that empty drink cans are already a problem.”

It’s txting times for many parents: “It’s a classic case of if you can’t beat them, join them, especially if you’re a parent. NSW’s Deputy Police Commissioner Dave Owens has mastered the complications of the teenage mind to solve one of his most important cases yet. And it may just hold some answers for parents everywhere. He has discovered that if he texts his 17 and 19-year-old daughters to tell them dinner is ready it works better than if he calls out to tell them to come downstairs. Welcome to the modern method of communication with teenagers. Academics, including one who has even posted a Twitter message to ask his wife for a coffee when she was sitting next to him, were unsurprised by Owens’ discovery. “If I yell out to them they ignore me, they’re with their phone or with their Myspace so if I SMS them I get a response. It is a sign of their generation,” Mr Owens said. “If dinner is ready and I want them to come down it saves me yelling four and five times up the stairs. My yelling gets ignored – my SMS gets an instant reply. They are straight down.”

I’ll paay that: “Playboy magazine is about to get its oldest ever playmate after a Dutch reality television star agreed to reveal all at the age of 60. Singer and Holland’s Got Talent judge Patricia Paay [above] will strip off for next month’s issue of the raunchy men’s magazine. “I’ll show it all. The results are classy, but I’ll hide nothing,” Paay said. Despite her years, photographer Philip Riches said the blonde star still looks stunning. “She is amazing and has an exceptionally good body. She is so open and has a lot of energy. At the end of the shoot, I was exhausted,” Riches said. In a message to bolster older ladies everywhere, the photographer added everything about the diva is real – “her breasts, her butt, her legs, nothing is fake, maybe except for her nails.” The photos were shot at a country house and depict Paay running around the woods naked.”

Cops on trail of gingerbread vandal: “The people of Bergen rolled out the cookie dough on Monday as local police tried to sniff out vandals who destroyed the Norwegian city’s traditional Christmas decoration — a town of gingerbread houses. On Saturday, vandals entered a massive tent in central Bergen and crushed most of the 650-cookie-house town, topping off the ruins with paint and fire extinguisher foam. Police in Norway’s second largest city asked the public to offer information that could lead to the perpetrators. “The people who did this must be full of gingerbread dust, They will smell a long way,” police inspector Erik Sveaas told news agency NTB. Local media reported that the destruction had shocked the residents of Bergen, a picturesque city on the North Sea coast where children decorate hundreds of gingerbread houses every year before Christmas. Steinar Kristoffersen, who runs the Bergen Sentrum foundation behind “the worlds largest and greatest gingerbread town”, said the opening of the exhibit will be postponed well into next week due to the vandalism.”

Women nag ‘useless’ husbands to feel more feminine: “Women have long complained that their man doesn’t pull his weight on household chores. But his lack of effort on the domestic front could actually be a myth created by his partner, researchers have found. According to a major study, female breadwinners exaggerate their partner’s uselessness around the home because they feel guilty about devoting too much time to their career, and not enough to their role of wife and mother. By nagging their man over his alleged shortcomings, women feel more feminine because they can control the traditionally female role of maintaining the home and family, experts say. ‘Working women who provide the majority of the household’s income continue to articulate themselves as the ones who ’see’ household messes and needs as a way to retain claim to an element of traditional female identity,’ said Dr Rebecca Meisenbach, professor of communication at Missouri University. Dr Meisenbach questioned 15,000 American female breadwinners for the study, to be published in the journal Sex Roles this week. She said most of the women she interviewed did not resent the fact that their husband was neither a breadwinner nor a home maker. ‘Over 60 per cent said they enjoyed the control they experienced. By highlighting stories of how men have to be told or asked to do specific chores in he home, these female breadwinners are making sure they still fit gender boundaries of a wife as someone who manages the home and children.”

And don’t forget to catch up with all the Strange Justice before you go.

PRESENTER: Who painted the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel?

CALLER: Leonardo di Caprio.

PRESENTER: Was the Tyrannosaurus Rex a carnivore or a herbivore?

CONTESTANT: No, it was a dinosaur.

ANNE ROBINSON: What type of bear lives in the Arctic?

CONTESTANT (after much thought): Penguin.

ANNE ROBINSON: What was the principal language used by the ancient Romans?

CONTESTANT: Greek.

PRESENTER: Emmental and Double Gloucester are both types of what?

CALLER: Banks.

JEREMY PAXMAN: Of all Beatrix Potter’s books, which is the only one to feature a human in the title?

ANTONY BEEVOR (author and historian): Peter Rabbit

ANNE ROBINSON: What ‘B’ was a pseudonym used by Charles Dickens?

CONTESTANT: Bart Simpson.

STEVE WRIGHT: Johnny Weissmuller died on this day. Which jungle-swinging character clad only in a loincloth did he play?

CALLER: Jesus.

ANNE ROBINSON: The point on a golf club or a tennis racket that gives the best contact is alliteratively known as the what spot?

CONTESTANT: The g-spot.

ANNE ROBINSON: Who won the U.S. Open Tennis Championship wearing a black dress modelled on Audrey Hepburn’s in Breakfast at Tiffany’s?

CONTESTANT: Roger Federer.

DARREN DAY: What area of Germany is the cake named after, made with chocolate, cream, kirsch and cherries?

CONTESTANT: Belgium?

PRESENTER: What is the capital of Cuba?

CALLER: Is it Belgium?

DALE WINTON: Alderney and Sark – are they part of the Channel Islands?

CONTESTANT: Ooooh! Is that the English Channel? I don’t know, are there islands in the English Channel? I’ve never heard of any. France – that’s near the English Channel isn’t it?

ANNE ROBINSON: Pakistan was part of which other state until it achieved independence in 1947?

CONTESTANT: Bulgaria.

DAVE LEE TRAVIS: In which European country are there people called Walloons?

CALLER: Wales.

QUIZMASTER: Where is the Sea of Tranquility?

CONTESTANT: Ibiza.

ANNE ROBINSON: What kind of dozen is 13?

CONTESTANT: Half a dozen.

STEVE WRIGHT: On what part of the body is a lobotomy performed?

CONTESTANT: The bottom.

PRESENTER: What was the date of the Battle of Hastings?

CONTESTANT: Ooooh! Er…. was it 1974?

ANNE ROBINSON: Which English queen rode a chariot with knives on the wheels?

CONTESTANT (full of confidence): Victoria!

PRESENTER: Which ancient army was discovered in China in 1974?

CONTESTANT: The Territorial Army.

PRESENTER: What was Hitler’s first name?

CONTESTANT: Heil.

PRESENTER: Who was the Prime Minister before Tony Blair?

CALLER: George Bush.

PRESENTER: Name Prince Charles’s younger sister.

CALLER: Is it Camelia?

PRESENTER: What religion was Guy Fawkes?

CALLER: Jewish.

ANNE ROBINSON: In Roman Catholicism, baptism, confirmation and matrimony are three of the seven what?

CONTESTANT: Deadly sins.

ANNE ROBINSON: What man made structure built during the 3rd century BC is often said to be visible from space?

CONTESTANT: The Millennium Dome.

PRESENTER: According to legend, who shot an apple off the top of his son’s head?

CONTESTANT: Well, straightaway I’m thinking of Isaac Newton.

More here

THE NEWS

Germany’s Robin Hood banker spared jail: “The manager of a bank branch in Germany who secretly transferred money from rich clients to heavily indebted customers has been sentenced to a 22-month suspended jail term. The 62-year-old woman, dubbed “the Robin Hood banker”, was found guilty of moving a total of €7.6 million ($12 million) between December 2003 and February 2005, in 117 separate transfers. Her altruistic aim was to prevent clients from seeing their accounts closed for want of funds. As a rule, she transferred the money back when the indebted clients were solvent again, but €1.1 million ($1.7 million) was lost when certain customers were unable to pay their debts. The court, in the western city of Bonn, took a lenient view of the fraud as she owned up immediately and took none of the money for herself. It also judged she had suffered enough after losing her job and paying compensation. According to press reports, she now lives off a tiny pension.”

McDonald’s turns golden arches green in Germany: “With the climate change summit in Copenhagen fast approaching, even McDonald’s has decided to go green — at least with its logo. At German branches of the US fast-food chain, the famous golden arches will be emblazoned on a green background, rather than its usual red, McDonald’s Germany vice-president Holger Beeck said. The change would be made on all new and refitted restaurants “out of respect for the environment”, Beeck told the Financial Times Deutschland. A study earlier this month showed that McDonald’s was the most popular brand for Germans between the ages of 12 and 18. McDonald’s has in the past come under fire from environmental groups on several fronts, including its use of packaging and deforestation. However, environmental campaigners Greenpeace have also praised the company for efforts to be more environmentally friendly, including introducing refrigerators without harmful chlorofluorocarbons.”

Man discovers Charles Manson is his real dad: “A man who went in search of his biological father was shocked to learn it was famed serial killer Charles Manson. Matthew Roberts, a 41-year-old DJ who lives in Los Angeles, said the shock of discovering his father sent him into depression. Mr Roberts grew up in Rockford, Illinois but didn’t know he was adopted until his sister told him at age 10. Despite his adoptive father telling him “nothing good” would come of discovering who his real parents were, Mr Roberts used a social services agency to locate his mother, Terry. She confirmed Mr Roberts was adopted and told him his birth name was Lawrence Alexander but would not reveal the last name. Eventually Terry relented and revealed that Mr Roberts’ father was Manson, who she claims raped her in 1967 after she had succumbed to his manic charisma. “She even said, ‘You look just like him’, Mr Roberts said recalling the shocking revelation. Manson has confirmed that he could be Mr Roberts’ father and that he remembers Terry. Mr Roberts fears he may have inherited some of Manson’s characteristics but insists he is a very peaceful person. “I’m not nuts but I’ve got a little bit of it,” Mr Roberts said.”

Police issue worst e-fit in the entire world… and it works!: “Some have compared it to the scarecrow in the Wizard of Oz, while others wondered how hard it could be to find a man who apparently does not have ears. But it’s police in Bolivia who may yet have the last laugh. By some miracle they actually managed to capture a murder suspect using what may well be the worst e-fit in the entire world. Bolivian authorities released this crudely-drawn e-fit of the man believed to have taken part in the murder of a taxi driver in March. His body was found in March. He had been stabbed eleven times and then his body had been burnt. The e-fit was drawn by a woman who lived in the area where Rafael’s body was found. She claimed the drawing showed the man who killed the taxi driver and then set his body on fire. YouTube video of a Pat Noticias news anchor solemnly announcing the release of the e-fit was quickly picked up by bemused bloggers and become an Internet hit just days after being post. But police efforts may have paid off. They have made at least one arrest in the case, nabbing a suspect who was then paraded before the cameras – although, as he cannot be identified, most media sites cheekily blocked his face out with an image of the e-fit.”

Australian bank gets rewarded for dumping fees: “It was a colossal gamble — the first major bank to dump penalty fees to appease angry customers, a move that would flush more than $100 million down the drain annually. But it appears National Australia Bank’s pre-emptive bet on fee reductions has paid off in spades. A month after dumping all penalty fees, NAB saw a 40 per cent reduction in customer complaints and a sixfold increase in customer acquisitions. NAB chief executive Cameron Clyne yesterday admitted his market-leading purge on penalty fees was so successful in driving new business and generating customer goodwill that it almost covered the drop in fee revenue. The bank announced in July it would be dumping its overdrawn account and dishonour fees in a bid to win new customers and improve the bank’s image.”

And don’t forget to catch up with all the Strange Justice before you go.

After years of neglect, I have pruned my blogroll (in the side column under “OTHER BLOGS”). I checked each link and found most of them “dead” or no longer regularly updated. So there are only about a tenth as many blogs on it compared to what used to be there. They should all now be “live”, however.

Any suggestions for blogs that should be there are welcome but will not necessarily be acted on.

THE NEWS

Dad spoke to son in Klingon: “A dad spoke only KLINGON to his son for the first three years of his life to see if he could pick up the alien language. Linguist Dr d’Armond Speers came up with the idea after watching an episode of Star Trek. He spent days translating phrases into Klingon – hoping his toddler’s first word would be “vav” rather than “dad”. Dr Speers, of Minnesota, US, battled on with commands like “find the USS Enterprise”, – but his wife only spoke English to the infant. He said: “He was definitely starting to learn it. When Alec spoke back to me in Klingon his pronunciation was excellent.” Eventually he abandoned his scheme, admitting his son “stopped listening to me when I spoke in Klingon”. He added: “It was clear he didn’t enjoy it.” Alec, now 13, doesn’t speak a word of Klingon.”

University cracks down on fat blacks: “A UNIVERSITY’S requirement that overweight undergraduates take fitness classes before they receive their degrees has upset students and drawn criticism from health and legal experts. Officials at Lincoln University, near Philadelphia, said they were concerned about high rates of obesity and diabetes, especially in the African-American community. “We know we’re in the midst of an obesity epidemic,” said James L. DeBoy, chairman of Lincoln’s department of health, physical education and recreation. “We have an obligation to address this … [knowing] there’s going to be some fallout.” Students are required to have tests of their body mass index, a measure of weight to height. Students with an index of 30 or above – considered obese – are required to take a weekly Fitness for Life class, which involves walking, aerobics, weight training and information on nutrition, stress and sleep. Mr DeBoy said students were not required to lose weight, they just had to pass the class through attendance and participation.”

Rare Darwin book found in British toilet: “A first edition of Charles Darwin’s seminal On the Origin of Species will be sold this week after it was found in a family’s toilet in southern Britain. The book, which was first printed in 1859, was bought by a family for just a few shillings in a shop about 40 years ago, Christie’s auction house said. The family has since kept the work on a bookcase in the guest lavatory at their home in the Oxford area, it said. The book will go under the hammer in London tomorrow to coincide with the 150th anniversary of the publication of the father of the theory of evolution’s famous work. The book, about 1250 copies of which were first printed, is expected to fetch €60,000 ($100,000). Margaret Ford, head of books and manuscripts at Christie’s, said the book would have been a bargain when it was bought by the present owner. “It’s incredibly important,” Ms Ford said, adding of the current owner: “He knew it (the book) was textually important. “He maybe did not know how much of a bargain he was getting.” Christie’s said the son-in-law of the current owners was at an exhibition on Darwin and spotted a picture of the spine of the work. He realised the book in the toilet was something special, matching the binding of the work in the picture.

NYC teacher sues for slipping on condom: “A teacher is suing the Department of Education after slipping on condoms. Karen Hollander is blaming the department for failing to clean up the condoms and other rubbish and claiming that this negligence made the area unsafe. Hollander said she suffered injuries to her head and nervous system after her fall at the High School of Art & Design in New York City on November 12, 2008. The suit says school officials failed to maintain safety in the cafeteria by allowing trash that included condoms to pile up on the floor. “They caused, allowed and permitted condoms to be distributed by school personnel to the students, many of which were opened during the school lunch period and thrown on the floor,” said the suit.” [Classy school!]

Now THAT’S a parking ticket!: “A sports car that had been illegally parked near Downing Street was blown up by police amid fears of a terrorist attack. Michael Raphel, 28, left his red Honda Civic Type R on double yellow lines less than a quarter of a mile from Number 10. The Metropolitan Police carried out two controlled explosions after CCTV footage showed him running from the parked vehicle. The incident happened on November 7, the day before a Remembrance Sunday Parade. Mr Raphel, a businessman from Headington, Oxford, who was visiting London to celebrate a friend’s birthday, said he returned to find his burnt out car surrounded by anti-terror police. ”They explained that because I was seen running from the car, and because of the parades the next day, it had heightened their suspicions. ”The driver and passenger windows had been blown out and the bonnet and boot had come open with the force… Mr Raphel, who owns a men’s designer clothing store, said he would be seeking compensation from the police and an apology. But a spokesman for confused.com, an insurance price comparison website, said it is unlikely Michael will receive a payout for his car as he parked illegally.”

And don’t forget to catch up with all the Strange Justice before you go.

* I much prefer being over the hill to being under it. ~Bruce Lansky

* At my age I don’t care if my mind starts to wander- just as long as it comes back again. ~Mike Knowles

* Middle age is when a narrow waist and a broad mind begin to change places. ~Glenn Dorenbush

* When you can finally afford the rings you want, you’d rather no one noticed your hands. ~Lois Muehl

* A man has reached middle age when he is warned to slow down by his doctor instead of the police. ~Henny Youngman

THE NEWS

Britain: Cheap clothes better made that expensive ones: “In a study, analysing how well made high street clothes were, supermarket and so-called value retailers performed better than designer names. The consultancy tested ten pairs of ladies jeans and ten polo shirts. The jeans ranged in price from £7 to £123, while the polo shirt ranged in price from £12 to £85. In both cases the cheap versions of the clothes generally fared better than the expensive versions. The garments were sent to a professional testing laboratory, used by the fashion industry, and were tested in 15 different trials, which analysed their colour-fastness, their seam strength, how much they shrunk, and their resistance to abrasion. Andy Garbutt, retail expert at PWC, said: “We didn’t test for fit, fashionability or brand. We purely looked at the quality of the clothes, how well made they were. “And it is clear that there is no longer a link between quality and price. It may not have been the cheapest clothes that won, but it was often the second cheapest.” With the jeans the top performing pair cost £8, followed by an £18 pair with a £9.50 pair in third place. The worst two performers were a £40 and a £25 pair. The £123 pair came in fourth place. With the polo shirt the top performer cost £12, followed by another £12 version, with a £4.50 shirt in third place. The average price of the three worse performers was £15, with the £85 shirt in fifth place.”

Free silver penis implants for all Cubans: “CUBA’S government has offered its first free penis implants, part of a program set to be expanded across the communist island, an official newspaper reported. It is likely not what Karl Marx had in mind when he imagined a society transformed “from each according to his abilities, to each according to his needs”, but Juventud Rebelde reported the silicon and silver penis implants were set to become more common. Men in seven Cuban provinces will be eligible for the procedure, which urologist Juan Carlos Yip boasted was normally “exclusive to first-world countries and at a high cost”. “It will be carried out in patients whose sexual suffering does not respond positively to traditional treatments,” he said. The over-40s and those with diabetes or circulation problems are set to be first in line”. [Would YOU trust a Cuban doctor to operate on your willy?]

British poll reveals sexual ignorance: “More than one in 10 British people don’t realise that a woman can still get pregnant if she has sex standing up, according to a poll. Nearly one in five – 19 per cent – are also unaware that a woman can get pregnant during her period, or if the man withdraws before ejaculation, according to the Government-commissioned survey. While 11 per cent believe that sex standing up is an effective contraceptive method, more than a third – 37 per cent – never talk about contraception with their partners at all. “In spite of our love of talking about sex and relationships, the survey suggests it’s our lack of knowledge that is causing confusion,” commented sex and relationship expert Dr Pam Spurr. Other findings from the poll of 2000 people aged 16-50 include that 31 per cent never discuss sexual health with partners, while 17 per cent don’t know that infections like herpes and genital warts are resistant to antibiotics.”

An eatery to avoid: “If you’re frustrated by poor service at a restaurant, think twice before you decide to not tip. You may be in for a bit more than just a dirty look from the waiter. “Nobody, nobody wants to be forced to pay a tip or be arrested for terrible service,” Leslie Pope said when her happy hour ended in handcuffs. Pope and John Wagner were hauled away by police and charged with theft for not paying the mandatory 18 percent gratuity totaling $16 after eating at the Lehigh Pub in Bethlehem, Pa. with six friends. Pope claimed that they had to wait nearly an hour for their order and that she had to get napkins and silverware for the table herself. After the $73 bill came, the group paid for food, drinks, and tax but refused to pay the tip. After explaining the bad service to the bartender in charge, Pope claimed he took their money and called police. The couple was handcuffed and placed in the back of a police car. Police charged them with theft since the gratuity was part of the actual bill. However, it is doubtful that the charges will hold up in front of a judge. The couple is scheduled to appear in court next month.”

Smiling in a bikini on Facebook costs Canadian woman her insurance benefits: “Facebook can be a double-edged sword, a Canadian woman learned when an insurance company cut her health benefits, claiming she was healthy after seeing pictures of her smiling in bikini at the beach. Nathalie Blanchard, 29, took long-term sick leave from her job at IBM in Bromont, Quebec, more than a year ago for severe depression. She was receiving monthly benefits from her insurance company, Manulife. When Ms Blanchard called Manulife to ask why the payments dried up, the insurance company said that “I’m available to work, because of Facebook,” she told CBC television. She said that Manulife cited several pictures Ms Blanchard had posted on her social networking website page, including some showing her enjoying herself during a male strip-tease show at a Chippendales bar, celebrating her birthday and bathing in the sun. Based on these postings, the firm claimed Ms Blanchard was no longer depressed. Manulife declined to comment on the incident but said in a statement that “we would not deny or terminate a valid claim solely based on information published on websites such as Facebook.” But the company did recognize that it uses such information to learn more about their clients.”

And don’t forget to catch up with all the Strange Justice before you go.

More here

THE NEWS

What’s in a name?: “A London-based translation firm is offering parents-to-be the chance to check the meaning of prospective baby names in other languages to avoid inadvertently causing their offspring future embarrassment. Celebrity couple Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes might have thought twice about naming their daughter Suri if they’d known that it means ‘pickpocket’ in Japanese, ‘turned sour’ in French, and ‘horse mackerels’ in Italian, suggest Today Translations. For 1,000 pounds ($1,678), the company’s linguists will carry out a ‘basic name translation audit’ of names, checking their meaning in 100 languages, or more for an additional cost. While open to everyone, the firm said it expects the service is likely to attract celebrity clients, who are known for giving their babies unusual names.”

Actress loses hip: “She once made international headlines for her naked and pregnant Vanity Fair cover but actress Demi Moore has been caught up in a controversy of a different kind after appearing on the December cover of the American high-fashion bible W (pictured above). A super-svelte Moore, draped in Balmain leather and metal mesh dress gold, appears to have been heavily photoshopped in the image, with some blogs calling it the “worst photoshopping disaster ever”. One even points out that a whole chunk of her left hip was erased, so the lines don’t match up with the curve of her thigh. The Chaser’s Chas Liccardello has even pitched in his 10-cents worth, twittering yesterday: “Either Demi Moore’s been photoshopped or she needs hip replacement surgery.”

Spray could help men in bed: “Men who are too hasty in bed could be helped by a spray that numbs sensation. Trial volunteers who used the anaesthetic spray lasted five times longer during sexual intercourse than they did when given a dummy treatment. The spray, known as PSD502, consists of a combination of two sensation-numbing drugs. Results of a study involving 256 men suffering from premature ejaculation (PE) in the US, Canada and Poland were presented in California. It showed that administering the treatment five minutes before intercourse delayed ejaculation up to five-fold. The men also reported improved levels of control and sexual satisfaction and reduced stress. Lead researcher Professor Stanley Althof, from the Centre for Marital and Sexual Health of South Florida in West Palm Beach, US, said: “Premature ejaculation can have a powerful negative impact on the emotional and sexual lives of men and their partners. “Recently, the international sexual health community agreed that PE should be defined as ejaculation occurring within approximately one minute of penetration that causes the patient distress. Now we need to work to develop treatments, and these encouraging results with PSD502 seem to be a step in the right direction.”

China: Scaredy-cat tigers: “Zoo-keepers in China say their tigers have grown so tame that they’re frightened of the chickens they’re supposed to eat. Keepers have been trying to encourage them to follow their natural instincts by throwing them live chickens — but without success. … Feeder Shi Ruqiang said: ‘They’re supposed to be wild and scary, but due to their soft lifestyles and human care they have gradually lost their wild nature. I have been trying to interest them with live chickens but it was quite a funny scene. The tigers were so scared that they wouldn’t go near them. One chicken passed out and the tigers did eventually approach it — but then it woke up again and squawked and they ran for their lives!’”

Christmas “bongs”: “Customs officials say they got a surprise when they found 316,000 glass bongs disguised as Christmas ornaments at the Los Angeles harbor. U.S. Customs and Border Protection said Thursday that agents found the highly decorated drug pipes in 860 boxes shipped from China. The cargo, estimated to be worth more than $2.6 million, had been described as glass figures and Christmas ornaments. The bongs were seized Tuesday at the Los Angeles/Long Beach port complex.”

And don’t forget to catch up with all the Strange Justice before you go.

1.. My husband and I divorced over religious differences. He thought he was God and I didn’t.

2.. I don’t suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it.

3.. Some people are alive only because it’s illegal to kill them.

4.. I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.

5.. Don’t take life too seriously; No one gets out alive.

6.. You’re just jealous because the voices only talk to me

7.. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.

8.. Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.

9.. I’m not a complete idiot — Some parts are just missing.

10.. I’m out of my mind. Back in five minutes.

11.. God must love stupid people; He made so many.

12.. The gene pool could use a little chlorine.

13.. Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.

14.. Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?

15.. Being ‘over the hill’ is much better than being under it!

16.. Wrinkled Was Not One of the Things I Wanted to Be When I Grew up.

17.. Procrastinate Now!

18.. A hangover is the wrath of grapes.

19.. A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance.

20.. Stupidity is not a handicap. Park elsewhere!

21.. They call it PMS because Mad Cow Disease was already taken.

22.. He who dies with the most toys is nonetheless DEAD.

23.. A picture is worth a thousand words, but it uses up three thousand times the memory.

24.. The trouble with life is there’s no background music.

25.. I smile because I don’t know what the hell is going on.

THE NEWS

Worried pimp called off Rabbi’s three-day drug-fuelled orgy: “An eminent rabbi was so exhausted after three days of constant cocaine-fuelled partying with escorts that his pimp grew worried and cancelled that day’s supply of girls, a jury was told. Rabbi Baruch Chalomish, 55, who has a £6 million fortune, was a scholarly academic, an accomplished businessman, a charity giver and a dutiful family man until his first wife died of cancer and his world fell apart. He turned to alcohol in his depression, then took refuge in cocaine, spending up to £1,000 a week. He lived in squalor, seeking comfort from prostitutes, Manchester Crown Court was told. The prosecution said that Chalomish was the financier in a commercial cocaine supply business while Nasir Abbas, 54, a convicted drug dealer, provided the drugs and the customers. The pair rented a luxury flat in Manchester and for ten days over the new year enjoyed a non-stop party. Mr Abbas admitted to police that he procured a supply of girls from an agency called Pure Class. They were also offered cocaine. The court was told that on the ninth day, and after the rabbi had stayed up for three straight days, Mr Abbas was so concerned about his health that he scrapped that day’s supply of prostitutes. In a text message to a woman called Clio he wrote: “Hi Clio, I have tried to wake Shel up but I don’t want to wake him. He was very tired because he had no sleep for three days, needed to rest, because he is going to his office to work on Monday at 8. Please cancel the party today.”

Tokyo has more top restaurants than Paris (and it is the French who say so): “Paris has been overtaken by Tokyo as the city with the most three Michelin-starred restaurants in the world. The French capital is traditionally viewed by the so-called ‘foodie’s bible’ as the world centre of gourmet dining. But now 11 restaurants in the Japanese city have been awarded the coveted three stars – one more than in Paris. Japan is also the world’s most-starred city with 261 stars in total –34 more than last year – awarded to 197 restaurants. Tokyo overtook Paris two years ago for having the highest total of stars in the city, but now has the highest number of the coveted three-star awards, although Paris points out it has only 40,000 restaurants in the city, compared to 160,000 in Tokyo. Jean-Luc Naret, director of Michelin Guides, said: ‘Tokyo is by far the world capital of gastronomy and now also has the most three-star restaurants. ‘The city has great quality ingredients, from the sea, from the mountains and the quality of the chefs is excellent.’ London has just one three-starred restaurant in the 2009 Michelin guide – Gordon Ramsay in Chelsea.”

Nicknames win official standing: “The inhabitants of a small Italian town where 8000 residents share the same surname have won a legal battle to use their nicknames, including “Fat”, “Mad” and “Peasant”, on official documents. For more than 200 years, the people of Chioggia, near Venice, have used nicknames to distinguish between distantly related families, but they were never officially recognised. Now, after a decree from the Interior Ministry, families Chioggia will be allowed to adopt their soubriquets as a second, official surname. This would “avoid a lot of confusion, as well as making filling out forms less complicated”, said the mayor, Romano Tiozzo, whose family nickname is Pagio, or straw. His ancestors were straw sellers. In many small towns where families have lived for centuries, the entire population often shares just a few names. Chioggia, at the southern end of the Venice lagoon, is an extreme case, with 8000 Boscolos and 5000 Tiozzos out of 52,000 people. Mr Tiozzo’s opponent in the last mayoral election was Lucio Tiozzo “Fasiolo”, dialect for bean.”

British grandmother who was sterilised – twice – gives birth to ‘miracle baby’: “A grandmother has just given birth to a ‘miracle’ baby boy 13 years after being sterilised twice. Debbie Amos, 43, had the operation to stop her falling pregnant again after having her first three children. But three months ago she felt strange movements in her stomach and a test revealed she was six months pregnant. Now she is mother to health baby boy Connor, born last week and weighing in at 8lbs 8oz, who is younger than her grandchildren. Mrs Amos, of Colchester, Essex, said: ‘At the end of July, I started feeling tired and then felt movements in my stomach. Mrs Amos made a trip to the doctor who told her he thought she was about 18 weeks pregnant but a scan revealed she was actually 23 weeks pregnant. Mrs Amos said: ‘I was doubly sterilised – my fallopian tubes were both cauterised and clipped so I thought there was no way i could get pregnant again. ‘And as you get older it is harder to conceive anyway, so it is the last thing I expected.’ But when baby Connor arrived at Colchester General Hospital last Thursday, the couple were just happy he was healthy. Mrs Amos said: ‘We were very relieved he is fit and healthy. I didn’t have any tests as I didn’t know I was pregnant until so late on and there were obviously added risks because of my age. ‘When you think of all the things that could have gone wrong, he is just a little miracle. ‘We are getting used to the nappies and the lack of sleep – my husband has taken to it again and he is coping well. ‘We wouldn’t change him for the world.’

Indian Air force attacked over commonsense rule: “The Indian Air Force has drawn flak from women activists after it suggested it might allow female pilots to fly fighter jets but only if they promised not to have babies. The air force, which in 1994 allowed women to fly transport planes and helicopters, argued pregnancy could cause millions of dollars worth of lost training. Women’s forums attacked air force deputy chief P K Barbora who made the suggestion at a news conference yesterday. “India is a democratic country and such regressive comments are only a reflection of the patriarchical mindset of the decision makers,” said Anju Dubey of Delhi-based Centre for Social Research forum.”

And don’t forget to catch up with all the Strange Justice before you go.

THE NEWS

Japan wants more babies: “With the recovery tenuous, deflation afflicting all levels of commerce and the country at risk of sovereign debt crisis, it seemed an odd time for Japan’s biggest and most austere banking group to be telling its staff to knock off early. Particularly when they realised how they were supposed to be using the extra one hour and 50 minutes of free time. The national birth-rate is low, ran the round-robin e-mail that landed in people’s in-boxes on Monday, so let’s all enjoy “family time”. The unambiguous note of encouragement heralded Mitsubishi UFJ’s week-long effort to help to reverse Japan’s ultra-low fertility rates and declining population: joining a national campaign in which both enthusiasm and participation is expected to be miserably low. MUFJ is believed to be among only a tiny number of companies taking the scheme seriously. Management’s idea, according to a woman who works on the bank’s Tokyo trading floor, seemed to be that by getting everyone out of the office by 5.10pm, rather than the 7pm that most staff were used to, couples would be reunited earlier after work, passion would not be crushed by exhaustion and Japan’s chronic population decline would be reversed. At only 1.3 per cent in 2007, Japan’s fertility rate – the average number of children for each woman aged between 15 and 49 – is among the lowest in the world. Nearly a quarter of the population is over the age of 65. Last month the domestic market for incontinence pants and baby nappies drew exactly level.”

First personalised newspaper rolls off presses: “A newspaper tailored to readers’ individual wishes, and delivered to their door before 8am made its first appearance in Berlin yesterday. Billed as Europe’s first “personalised paper”, niiu, made its first appearance in Berlin yesterday. Customers of the paper choose what topics they want to read about — be it sport, politics, fashion or any from a wide choice — and receive news only on their chosen subject collated together and delivered like any other paper. Articles are pulled together from major German papers such as Handelsblatt, Bild and Tagesspiegel, foreign titles such as the International Herald Tribune or the New York Times, as well as major blogs and Internet news sources. For the right to print their news, niiu pays a licence to these papers, which in turn reach a younger audience, as niiu is aimed mainly at students, who pay €1.20 ($1.90) to get their news fix.”

How to woo a man… flash 40% of your flesh: “It is the question that has troubled many a young woman as she dresses for a night out: How much should she dare to bare? After all, if her clothes are too revealing, she may catch the eye of the wrong kind of man. But too prim and she may attract none at all. British scientists believe they have the answer, with an outfit that reveals 40 per cent of a woman’s skin providing just the right amount of attention. To hit on the figure, Leeds University psychologist Colin Hendrie sent four female researchers to one of city’s biggest nightclubs. There, they stood on a balcony overlooking the dancefloor, and noted what the female clubbers were wearing and how many times they were approached by men. All their observations were taped on dictaphones hidden in handbags. Specifically, women who showed off around 40 per cent of their skin were approached by twice as many men as those who were more covered up. For the purposes of the study, each arm accounts for 10 per cent, each leg for 15 per cent and the torso for 50 per cent. The head, hands and feet are not included in the calculation. Dr Hendrie said: ‘Any more than 40 per cent and the signal changes from “allure” to one indicating general availability and future infidelity. ‘Show some leg, show some arm, but not any more than that.’ The women who proved most popular combined the 40 per cent rule with tight clothing and sexy dancing.”

Women banned from wearing trousers in Paris: “A decree banning women from wearing trousers in Paris is still technically in force, it emerged on Monday. The rule banning women from dressing like men – namely by wearing trousers – was first introduced in 1800 by Paris’ police chief and has survived repeated attempts to repeal it. The 1800 rule stipulated that any Parisienne wishing to dress like a man “must present herself to Paris’ main police station to obtain authorisation”. In 1892 it was slightly relaxed thanks to an amendment which said trousers were permitted “as long as the woman is holding the reins of a horse”.

More folly from Australia’s wild North: ” Two bikini-clad girls have been photographed swigging champagne on top of a croc trap in a crocodile-infested river. The girls were photographed singing in the rain, using champagne bottles as microphones, while atop of the trap in Maningrida, Northern Territory, reports the Northern Territory News. Their male friends were also pictured laughing and joking while posing as cowboys riding on the trap. Park ranger and crocodile expert Garry Lindner said the behaviour of the men was absurd. “Crocs are attracted to the bait in the traps, so it is extremely dangerous to fool around like this,” he said.”

And don’t forget to catch up with all the Strange Justice before you go.

Kerry Cue, who runs the splendid – and rather unique – mathspig blog, has emailed me to point out a couple of recent posts she’s run. I would highly recommend them both, especially if your maths is at a higher level than mine (some of it’s a bit complicated for me). The first has a film bent, but it’s the second that I’m going to mention here. Kerry has picked out what she calls the “10 biggest mathematical disasters in the world.” I wonder if they’d be the same as yours (if indeed you have any…..)?

Here they are (for more explanation and detail, please visit Kerry’s blog)

1) The Millennium Bug:

Probably the most famous – and feared – mathematical event in the last few decades. The Y2 bug was supposed to destroy the world, making everything stop functioning because computers, apparently, wouldn’t recognise that going from 99 to 00 meant a new century rather than an error.

The Maths Error: guessing the answer.

In the end it didn’t happen like that – a disaster that didn’t really occur, or the perfect way to illustrate why you shouldn’t guess, but instead test a system.

How did we waste so much time – and money – on it? For, as Kerry points out, while consultants claimed their advice saved the world from catastrophe, countries that spent very little on the Y2K bug problem (eg. Italy and South Korea) experienced as few problems as those who had spent a good deal of money on it (i.e us!).

The solution: Don’t guess. Test parts of system by plugging in x00.

2) Tulip Mania

We’re going back in time for this one, to the 17th century in fact (see Deborah Moggach’s book Tulip Fever for more on this) when the price of tulip bulbs began to rise. Soon the bubble burst…(as so many bubbles have done since).

The Maths Error: assuming a graph is linear!

“People look at graphs”, writes Kerry, “and assume they are straight-line graphs. But many are not based on a rule or formula, but rather, hope. And when hope crashes, so does the value of a stock.”

3) The Millennium Bridge, UK

Remember the bridge which was too wobbly (but is fine now, luckily)? Well, Kerry says that it was a maths problem. “The bridge was designed in 2D. The engineers allowed for up and down movement, but not sideways. As any kid running across a suspension bridge in a playground knows that as you run, it wobbles sideways!”

The Maths Error: designing 3D Bridge in 2D.

Oops.

4) NASA Mars Climate Orbiter.

As Kerry says, “the unmanned NASA Mars Climate Orbiter reached Mars and executed a 16 minute 23 second main engine burn on 23rd September 1999 to establish an orbit around Mars at 150km. It orbited behind Mars and was never heard from again.”

The Maths Error: muddled units of length!

The Mars Climate Orbiter (which naturally, cost millions) disappeared, says Kerry, because a Lockheed Martin engineering team used imperial measurements while the JPL (Jet Propulsion Lab) team used the more conventional metric system. The wrong navigation information was sent to the Mars Climate Orbiter. It probably burnt up in the atmosphere.

5) The Superconducting Super Collider

This was the forerunner to the large Hadron Collider and it cost billions of dollars – spiralling completely out of control. However, it never actually got made and the project was cancelled in 1993.

The Maths Error: assuming mathematicians can count

See more on this on Wired Science.

6) Air Canada Flight 143

On 23rd July 1983, Air Canada Flight 143, a Boeing 747, ran out of fuel at 41,000 feet about half way through its flight.

The crew managed to guide the aircraft safely to an emergency landing – despite it having no fuel, which means no engines and no steerage.

Maths Error: Mudding units of volume.

There were two errors. One was that the fuel tank gauge wasn’t working. The second was that the ground crew filled the tanks according to their records – assuming them to be in litres. However, they had been recorded in gallons…..

See more on Wikipedia.

7) Conviction by Maths Error

Many of you will remember the tragic story of Sally Clark, who was wrongly convicted of killing her babies after a very high-profile court case when she was completely vilified. It was the evidence of Professor Roy Meadow which is held largely responsible for influencing the jury to convict. He said that the likelihood of both her children dying from cot death was one in 73 million.

Maths Error: not understanding statistics

Professor Meadow appears to have arrived at his figure by squaring 1 in 8,500 for likelihood of a cot death in similar circumstances. But, says Kerry, this only works if events are independent (like flipping a coin). It doesn’t any suggestion of genetic similaries into account, for example.

You can see more on Sally’s story on the Sally Clark website.

US Patriot Missile Problem

Maths Error: Numbers too big for the software programme

- apparently the programme was not designed to fit the size of the numbers involved (see Kerry’s blog for a more detailed explanation).

9) The Quebec Bridge Collapse

In August 1907, two compression cords in the south anchor arm of the Quebec Bridge failed. The bridge was intended to be the longest in the world, but it took just 15 seconds for it to collapse. 75 people lost their lives.

Maths Error: not doing the maths….

Kerry explains that the span of the bridge was lengthened, but the assumed weights were not changed. Lives were lost because of a basic error about which engineers had warned the authorities.

See more on this story.

10) Hurricane Katrina Levee Design

Hurricane Katrina caused terrible damage and resulted in almost 2,000 deaths. It was the largest natural disaster in US history.

The maths error: the 100 year flood won’t happen for 100 years

As Kerry writes: On July 31, 2006 the Independent Levee Investigation Team released a report on the Greater New Orleans area levee failures.

Their report “identified flaws in design, construction and maintenance of the levees. But underlying it all, the report stated, were the problems with the initial model used to determine how strong the system should be.” The hypothetical model storm upon which storm protection plans were based is called the Standard Project Hurricane or SPH. The model storm was simplistic, and led to an inadequate network of levees, flood walls, storm gates and pumps. The report also found that “the creators of the standard project hurricane, in an attempt to find a representative storm, actually excluded the fiercest storms from the database.”

Original story here (With links)

THE NEWS

British mothers rely on just nine recipes to feed their families: “The average mother relies on just nine different meals to feed her family, a study has found. Researchers found that hectic lifestyles, fussy children and partners who work long hours mean mothers are stuck in a rut when it comes to experimenting in the kitchen. Nine in ten mothers polled admitted cooking the same meals over and over again while one in four make the same meals on the same day of the week. The most common meal among the nation’s mothers was spaghetti Bolognese followed by roast dinners, a shepherd’s or cottage pie and a pasta dish. Yesterday a spokesman for Merchant Gourmet, a food product company who carried out the study of 4,000 Britons, said: ‘It’s not surprising, given the demands of modern family life, that home cooks revert back to the recipes they know and love. ‘What we found most interesting was the rise of the fussy family. ‘A massive 81 per cent of respondents claimed they have to make two or more meals every night and 23 per cent said that they would stick to the same meals because their children are fussy eaters.’ And nine most relied-upon meals are…. 1. Spaghetti Bolognese; 2. Roast dinner; 3. Shepherds Pie/Cottage Pie; 4. Pasta dish; 5. Meat and two veg; 6. Pizza; 7. Casserole/stew; 8. Sausages and chips/mash; 9. Indian/Curry”. The average mother cooks just three meals from scratch, a week.”

“Oasis of the Seas” arrives in Port Everglades: “The world’s biggest cruise ship has caused traffic jams in the US as hundreds of people clambered to get their first glimpse. The 225,000-ton megaship the Oasis of the Seas arrived at its new home at Port Everglades after its maiden voyage from Finland. Standing sixteen decks high and rising 20 stories, crowds applauded as the Oasis of the Seas pulled in accompanied by a flotilla of small boats and doused by water cannons. Carrying crew and construction workers, the vessel braved high seas and hurricane force winds in the North Atlantic Ocean along its 14-day journey from Finland. In Denmark the giant cruise liner came within half a meter of a bridge the Great Belt Fixed Link on its maiden voyage to Florida. The Oasis of the Seas can accommodate 6360 passengers, 2160 crew and offers a world of luxuries, including: 21 swimming pools, an ice rink, an aqua park, a casino, a zip line and real trees. With six levels of staterooms, a turf-covered chip and putt golf course, the world’s first open-air amphitheatre at the stern, two surfing simulators and a boardwalk surrounded by restaurants, it is more like a giant ritzy resort than a cruise ship.”

Expedition aims to recover Ernest Shackleton’s whisky: “A rare brand of whisky that British explorer Sir Ernest Shackleton left behind in Antarctica is the holy grail for a New Zealand drilling expedition. The New Zealand Press Association reports that the whisky was among supplies abandoned by Shackleton on his unsuccessful expedition to the south pole in 1909. The brand of McKinlay and Co no longer exists. Whyte & Mackay, the drinks giant that owned McKinlay and Co, had asked for a sample of the drink for a series of experiments, the NZPA quoted London’s Telegraph as reporting. The NZPA said the New Zealanders would use special drills to free the trapped crates and rescue a bottle from the crates, discarded near the Cape Royds hut used by the Nimrod expedition, or at least draw off a sample using a syringe. The crates were discovered in January 2006, but the bottle couldn’t be removed as they were too deeply embedded. The whisky was found under the floorboards of the hut while workers were clearing out a century’s worth of ice. The Shackleton expedition’s whisky could still be drinkable and taste exactly how it did 100 years ago.”

Agency wrongly announces royal death: “BELGIUM’S national press agency Belga erroneously announced the death of the country’s queen mother, after a mischievous posting on its new twitter-style service. On day one the new service was victim to a hoaxer who announced “the death of Queen Fabiola”, widow of Belgium’s king Baudouin. She had been, the message said, affected by the divorce of Prince Laurent, the younger son of Belgium’s current King Albert. The new service, called “I have news”, is aimed at allowing ordinary citizens to tell of any interesting event they may have witnessed, such as a train crash or a violent protest. The messages, which must be a maximum of 160 letters, can be left with any pictures on www.ihavenews.be and are delivered to Belga clients – newspapers, TV channels, etc – via the same wire service as their regular journalist-generated news. The false information was written in Dutch and signed by the equivalent of “Mr Everyone”. Later in the day the Belga management apologised for the “unfortunate” incident. However in a separate statement Belga journalists called for the new service to be scrapped, voicing concern that the uncontrolled dissemination of information could affect the agency’s credibility.”

Hippos kill crocodile in rare clash: ” Bathing hippos usually have a tolerant attitude towards their fellow creatures — until something snaps. And then, as this crocodile discovered the hard way, they are the most dangerous wild animals in Africa. Vaclav Silha, a Czech wildlife photographer, had set up his camera on the banks of the Grumeti in the Serengeti National Park, Tanzania, to take pictures of a group of 50 placid hippos when an explosive fight erupted — a thrashing scrum that ended seconds later in the crocodile’s violent death. “Mutual respect between these animals means fights occur very rarely,” Mr Silha said. “One of the only reasons you might see a conflict is if the hippos have young. The incautious croc got too close to a female who had calves and the whole group gathered into a defensive circle. “The crocodile suddenly raced across the backs of the hippos. It might have panicked and thought it was an escape route. It was the worst choice the reptile could ever have made. And it was definitely its last. “The island of hippos erupted with teeth and all I could see was the crocodile being repeatedly crushed in their huge mouths. His body slipped below the water and I didn’t see him again.” The hippo is an extremely aggressive, unpredictable animal and totally unafraid of humans. Its formidable size, weight and turn of speed have led to the deaths of far more humans than have been killed by lions.”

And don’t forget to catch up with all the Strange Justice before you go.

If not, why not?

The picture is in fact of Polanski himself, playing the part of a French police officer in a movie

THE NEWS

Coffee shop with topless staff to reopen: “A COFFEE shop with topless waitresses in the US is officially reopening after being burnt to the ground by an arsonist. Donald Crabtree, the owner of the Grand View Topless Coffee Shop at Vassalboro, Maine, has been granted a permit to reopen in a business trailer on the site. The shop has been operating in a tent since the arson attack in June, which is still being investigated. The coffee shop’s opening in February angered many residents in the small town and the fire occurred hours after Mr Crabtree discussed with local officials the idea of making the business more like a strip club. Mr Crabtree told the Boston Herald that business is currently slow, but customers are trickling in. The Grand View’s topless waitresses have volunteered to work just for tips and take home between $30 and $200 a day doing a job criticised by many. Star Cunningham, a 22-year-old waitress at the shop, told the US’s Sunday Best that they have encountered so much resistance due to the lack of similar venues in the area. Another topless waitress, Lisa Beaudreau, 23, said lack of employment options made working at the shop an attractive option. “It’s really hard to find a job in this area. The unemployment rate is really high,” Ms Beaudreau said.”

Problem gambler lent $1m despite $5m Las Vegas debt! “High stakes problem gambler Harry Kakavas was lent $US1 million by a Bahamian casino despite knowing he owed $US5 million to casinos in Las Vegas, a court has heard. An internet search showing Mr Kakavas had sold his home on the Gold Coast’s Hedges Avenue for a record $18 million allayed any fears management at Atlantis Paradise Island Casino had about his finances, the Victorian Supreme Court was told. It was decided Mr Kakavas should be allowed a $US1 million line of credit when he visited the casino during his November 2006 honeymoon in The Bahamas. In a four hour $US1.6 million gambling spree at Paradise Island Casino’s baccarat table, Mr Kakavas blew the credit and more than $US600,000 of his own money. The casino is suing Mr Kakavas, hoping to recoup the $US1 million and $US13,300 in commissions.”

Cruise ship trapped in ice: “More than 100 penguin-loving tourists including dozens from Britain are trapped by ice off Antarctica aboard a Russian ice-breaker cruise ship, officials and the tour operator said on Monday. The Kapitan Khlebnikov is in a bay near Snow Hill island, located off the northeastern end of the Antarctic Peninsula, and cannot leave as the bay is sealed off with ice, the Russian transportation ministry said. “The wind has currently slowed down in the area and the massing of the ice has ended. Everything is calm aboard the ice-breaker, nothing is threatening the passengers and crew,” the ministry said in a statement. “When the wind changes to a favourable direction, the ice-breaker will head into clear water and on to the port of Ushuaia,” at the extreme southern end of Argentina, the ministry predicted. There were 105 passengers aboard the vessel and the total delay in the ship’s scheduled trip could be around two days, it added. The ship has been at its current location for four days, German Kuzin, an official with the Far Eastern Shipping Company, the ship’s owner, said in televised remarks.” [Must be all that global warming]

Giant rock nearly crushes sleeping family: “A 1500-tonne boulder came within metres of crushing a sleeping family of four after breaking free from a large overhanging rock face on Black Friday. Jenny and Michael Day were asleep in their Wyberba home near Stanthorpe on the Granite Belt in southern Queensland when they were jolted awake by an “almighty crash” about 3am. They had to wait until daylight to discover the offending object – and could barely believe what they saw. “My husband rushed back inside with his camera and showed me the pictures he took,” Mrs Day said. “I said, ‘Holy crap’!” The enormous boulder had broken off a large rock face overhanging their property and tumbled about 150m. “About 50m more and we would have been gone. It would have completely crushed the house,” Mrs Day said. Mrs Day said they would just have to live with the rock, planted firmly next to the water tank. “It’s not like we can move it,” she laughed.”

British doctor jailed for abortion attempt: “A doctor has been jailed for six years for trying to poison his pregnant lover to bring on an abortion. Judge Richard Hone told the Old Bailey, UK’s Central Criminal Court, that Dr Edward Erin had been exposed as a “liar, cheat and predator” who led a fantasy life where he preyed on women by dazzling them with his wealth. The couple had a brief relationship following a Christmas party. Six weeks later she discovered she was pregnant. Ms Prowse, 33, refused to have an abortion. Erin wrote a prescription for anti-inflammatory, abortion-inducing drugs, made out in the name of his German teacher, according to The Times. He ground up the tablets on February 2, where his wife saw him but was told he was doing it for work. He put powder in her Starbucks coffee February 7 but she noticed it had been opened, The Times reported. The following day, he put some in orange juice at St Mary’s Hospital in Paddington, west London, where they both worked, but she noticed the seal was broken. Though tests showed they contained drugs to induce abortion, Ms Prowse later gave birth to a healthy boy, Ernie. Erin was arrested on February 14 last year, after Ms Prowse’s visit to the police.”

And don’t forget to catch up with all the Strange Justice before you go.